She Was Like Magic ✓

Chapter 28: Wash it Away

Sierra

I could feel this pounding and it was hurting so much.

I was trying to open my eyes but they felt so heavy.

OW. As I was stirring more and more, the headache grew so much worse. It felt like tiny oompah-loompahs were banging hammers against my skull.

I held my temple as I opened my eyes and had to jut them open to keep them open.

As my vision adjusted, I saw where I was. Ari's room. The wooden desk on the left, the plain walls and the muted colours. The dark navy blue bed sheets. How the fuck did I get here?

Fragments of last night came floating back to me. 

Fuck, what the hell did I do? 

I felt a huge course of anger flow through me. Why? Why did I have to lose control? Why did I let an image I worked hard to maintain just slip out of my own hands because of my own mistakes so easily? Why did I let her words get to me? Why did I let her words control me? Why couldn't I just be better? 

I swiped a tear that was rolling down my cheek away angrily. Why did I fuck up? Why did I do that again? 

The door opened interrupting the barrage of thoughts invading my head. It was Ari. He had his grey hoodie on and it was rumpled with his blue jeans on. Did he sleep like that because of me? And just like that my anger dissipated into an ache in my heart as I saw how tousled his hair was. His bed hair. I knew what that looked like when we woke up together, in happier circumstances. 

I shifted in the bed very slowly and pushed myself up to sit up as the bed sheets moved around me. He was carrying two glasses full of water really carefully and that's why hadn't noticed that I had now sat up in bed and was looking straight at him. 

He put the glasses down at his bedside table and then looked at me "You're awake" he smiled. I weakly smiled back and pushed my bare knees up to my chest as I hugged them to me. 

He sat down and picked up one of the glasses, holding it to my lips. He looked into my eyes, smiled and nodded towards the glass. 

I looked up at him and drank as he looked down at the glass, adjusting it every time I took a few sips. 

I didn't even know how much I was craving water until he made me drink it. He was so fucking thoughtful and was making me drink it so sweetly. Every time I fucked up or ran he was there to catch me and this time was no different. 

His eyebrows were furrowed as he concentrated on giving me the water, the little lines at the corner of his lips becoming prominent. I must have done so much stupid shit, I knew I would have. I knew. 

I finished the whole glass and once he set the glass down and turned to me I grabbed his hand and I pushed my lips into my mouth as I looked down to his sheets. 

How was I supposed to say anything when I was so ashamed of myself. How was I supposed to open my mouth that was probably shouting drunken profanities at him last night. I fiddled with his fingers in my lap as I stared down at them and sighed. 

His free hand came to caress my cheek. I closed my eyes and leaned into it tilting my head, his hand sending a tingle from my cheek right through my body. I opened my eyes and looked at him with a pained and sorrowful expression on my face, my eyebrows pulled in. 

"No, baby" he shook his head at me as his expression matched mine. 

I don't even know what he was saying no to, but he always knew what to say. Like I needed him to say that so I would stop berating myself.