The Misconceptions of You

Chapter 21: Breaking up with the Person I Love

Eunjin’s POV

I arrived at the café at around 8pm. Taemin was already waiting for me. For a moment there was an awkward silence between us. I wanted to ask him a lot of things but somehow a part of me was afraid to hear the answers.

“Eunjin-ah…” he broke the silence first.

“Hmmm?”

“Have your memories returned?”

I’m not sure why his asking that question but I decided to answer truthfully. “Some of them.”

“Do you remember what happened before you lost your memories?”

The memories of the boy being shot right in front of my eyes made me wince. “I remember a boy being shot but nothing else.” I wondered if he knew something that I don’t.

There are still a lot of questions in my mind but there’s this one question that I was really afraid to hear the answer. But I knew I had to ask. “Do you still love her? The person who gave you that?” I said referring to the bracelet he was wearing.

A long silence followed before he replied, “Yes.” That simple word made all the difference. It shattered my heart more than any daggers would. I can feel my eyes tearing-up. I didn’t want him to see me cry. Not now. So I tried my hardest to keep it in.

I gave him a weak smile. “What happened to her?” I asked although I didn’t know where I got that courage to know more. “Do you still know where she is?”

“Yes,” he replied.

“She must be really stupid for letting you go.”

“We were childhood friends but she couldn’t remember me anymore.”

I know that feeling of having a one-sided love because from the looks of things I’m currently in that state: being in love with someone who loves someone else. He must be in pain right now as much as I am.

“You’re so mean, Taemin. Why do you have to make me fall in love with you when you’re already in love with someone else?” I gripped one of my hands with the other trying to stop it from shaking. Tears were streaming down my face now and I can’t do anything about it. I wiped my tears with the back of my hand.

“I’m sorry,” he said although ‘I’m sorry’ are not the words I wanted to hear right now.

With a heavy heart I made a decision to do something which I should’ve done a long time ago. It wasn't an easy decision. I’m in love with him after all. But falling in love isn’t supposed to be this painful right? Of course I know it has to have ups and downs but it just doesn’t work. I love him. I really do. But I don’t think he feels the same way. Being with him and knowing he loves someone else hurts like hell. I have to let him go because he already has someone in his heart and it isn’t me.

When I was calm enough I said, “Let’s break up.” It was the second time I said those words but I was a little confused during the first. This time I mean it. What I have for him is love but it was the kind of love which is painful and I don’t have the courage to go on. I have to let him go. "This isn’t working so let’s just stop."

Taemin gave me a curt nod. I was really hoping he would convince me otherwise but all I seemed to be having now are nothing but disappointments. I was really stupid for hoping he wouldn’t let me go when I was the one who suggested the break up in the first place.

I said goodbye and without looking back I left. I desperately hoped that after tonight I wouldn’t be filled with regrets.

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Taemin’s POV

Eunjin already left a long time ago but I still couldn’t make myself move. My eyes stings from the tears I refused to shed. I took the necklace which I bought not too long ago out of my pocket. I regret not being able to give it to her but I didn’t want to burden her even more so I decided keep it instead. Or better yet just throw it away. It wasn’t able to serve its purpose anyway.

I was about to tell her everything. I was really tempted to tell the truth but then I realized it would be best for her not to know. The truth is more painful after all. At least she’s not hurting as much as I do right now. It’s enough that I am the only one in pain. Yes, that's good enough for me.

Earlier that day I received a call from Eunjin’s mom. She wanted us to meet so I went to the café just across the building where she works and meet her there.

“Lee Taemin shi… break up with my daughter” were the first words she said to me. I couldn’t say anything right away. I knew she was against our relationship from the very start. But what she’s asking from me isn’t something I can do so easily. Eunjin is my life after all. It’s as if she’s telling me to stop breathing.

"I'm sorry ma'am but I don’t think I can do that." The years I spent without Eunjin had been hell and I didn’t want to go through it again.

She became furious, her hand balled into a tight fist. "You don’t deserve my daughter. After all the pain you caused her how dare you come into her life again,” her words were like daggers piercing right through me. She just voiced out the exact things that had been weighing on my chest since that tragic night. “I warned you before. I never wanna see you near my daughter again!"

I didn’t say anything. I couldn’t. She was asking something impossible.

“Please Taemin-shi…” she begged. “I don’t want her to remember that night. It will surely be painful for her.” Eunjin’s mom started crying and I didn’t know what to do.

“Please…let me make up for everything. I won’t tell her anything. I promise. I will make sure she won’t remember."

“She will. No matter how hard you try to keep the truth from her she will continue to be reminded by the past if you don’t stay away from her.”

I knew she had a point. It was the exact thing I’ve been worried about. It was my own selfishness that brought us to Gunsan weeks ago. The place reminded me of so many wonderful memories and being with Eunjin while reminiscing the past made me so happy. And because of it Eunjin almost learned the truth. I can’t let it happen again.

And so I’ve decided to do what her mother asked of me. I finally let go of the person I love the most.