August 30th, 2018
After nearly 2 fucking months of milk enemas, Greg's leg bones recovered and he could now kick a pug like 50 yards. It was so fucking hilarious bro, you should have been there! Rowley vaped in this baby's face and the baby's mum curved stomped his ugly ass classic Rowley!
Okay, guys, the setting is that after a five-hour sesh of playing Twisted Wizard, Greg and Rowley decide to watch a suspicious Harry Potter Movie they found in Rowley's Mum's will. So like the cool kids they are, they watched the shit outta the motherfucker.
BTW, the reason why Manny isn't mentioned is that he died from radiation poisoning in Chernobyl, came back to life, and is now planning on adding the Metric System to the USA by killing Mr. World Wide (because he's the only reason the USA is fucked up).
Back to the current setting...
"Thank fuck we didn't go to that emo's birthday party at the mosh pit!" Said Rowley, in relief. "What's his name again? Isn't it like Lewis?" Said Greg, pondering about the ordeal. "Who fucking cares. I wanna watch this movie; what's it called anyway?" Said Rowley wonderingly.
"It says Hairy Porker and the Philosopher's Hole..." said Greg, confused. "That's a lotta typo." Said Rowley.
The *movie starts*
"Is that your mum?" Said Rowley.
"You like it there don't ya, Heffley?" Said I'm assuming is "Hairy Porker".
"*orgasm like noses*," said Susan, like the whore she is.
"Okay, now put the bracelet back onto to my wrist, it makes me feel good. Also, the moans are from my cold you sick fuck!" Said Susan Lmao.
"This movie's boring, turn it off." Said Greg.
"Wanna throw stones at Fregley?" Said Rowley. "K." Said Greg, bored outta his small mind.
So basically Fregley said "wanna play some Minecraft, guys?" in a friendly tone. "Joshie says Minecraft's for satanist weebs! Let's rush him!"
Rowley and Greg then throw rocks, bottles, vape cartridges, and eggs at Fregley until blood started cascading from his mouth. They then ran faster than a meteor falling down to Earth.
Suddenly, they heard a police siren in the background. It was coming for their asses. "Shit, we've been narked!" Said Greg, betrayed. In a blink of an eye, the police dogs came and mauled Rowley until Greg could see his bones protrude from his elbow. "Zoo wee mama!" Rowley shouted, shrilly.
"Get in the wagon, you're going to juvenile detention! (Evil laugh)", "Let's hope you don't drop the soap LMAO,😘" said the policeman who's definitely gonna turn to be a nonce in the next chapter.
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Diary of a Wimpy Kid: Rodrick's Draw
FanfictionWhile playing with Rowley, Greg and Rowley want some dank memes and decide to go to Rodrick's room because he got that shit. However, they find things that go against the Geneva Convention. What it's in the draw? Fucking read the story first you fuc...
