Lovelorn✔

Chapter 18: "You're still mine" Part 2

Nathan's P.O.V

I look through the cracked window and see Azelia stepping out of a car. I can't see who was in the driver seat and that makes me grind my teeth. Where is she coming from this late and with whom? I am going to make it clear that she is still mine since she doesn't remember.

I think I'm going to stop by a little later. I won't use the front door though, after all knowing her parents they won't want her to see me. Probably they would just shut the door in my face. If they did that I would have to show my demons but their Azelia's parents. I can't do such a thing to her. I would never hurt her.

She brings such a warm feeling when she's around. Always made me feel so comfortable even before we started a relationship. I never truly confided in her but there is no one I trusted more. When she left it was like I was left with no soul. I had no love left, all I did was go around and break hearts. I killed a couple people too and did a couple robbery's but that's just the thug life. Her leaving pushed me to the edge and the death of my parents pushed me over it.

The only thing that gave me grasp to living is holding onto a gun. Some might say they enjoy being the bad persona but for me its a way to forget my pain. I don't want to be this way but its the only way I cope after a tormentful past. I have been beaten and burned by the man I call father and I prayed for his death. Turned out it back fired because he died and left my mother with nothing but debts to be payed.

After she died and going to prison, I was left with those debts and nothing. No college degree to get me a legal job so I turned to crime. Typical but it is what it is.

Why do I feel so loyal to Azelia? I forgot the meaning of that word and love overall. Since she came back, which I thought she never would, I feel like I'm getting soft. I can't believe I cried in her chest. I haven't cried in three long years. Its been weed and alcohol to calm me but that time it was her embrace and it felt much better. I need that in my life. I need her. I haven't even been near another female since she got back. She has me wrapped around her finger and doesn't even know it.

11:03pm

Boooooffffff!!!!!!

I throw a stone directly at Azelia's window. I hope that this is still her room. After a short while no one seems to notice so I throw another one.

Booooofffff!!!!!!

After a minute I see the curtain shift and a figure which is no doubt hers. She opens it and realizes its me. I still can't believe its her, here. This brings back memories of happier times. If she only knew that she was my only light in all the surrounding darkness in my life and my only escape from self harm. She kept me from becoming suicidal. I would fall asleep each night just so I could see her smile in the morning and for that reason I kept smiling too. Even if it was forced and faked.

"Are you trying to wake my parents up and break my window?" she rolls her eyes. "Its so much my poor window can take."

"My bad, I'll make it up to you when I get up there." I smirk and she gulps.

I still make her nervous when I do that. This is all I need to know. She still has feelings for me. I slightly grin after noticing because it gave me a good feeling. She on the other is getting aggravated but I ignore her not so pretty expression. She is watching me meanwhile I climb up and I am taking my time for just that reason. I wonder what she's thinking...

I came into her room and went pass her to drop myself on her bed. Just like I always did back then. It brings back so many good memories. I wish things were always like this. When she would playfully jump on top of me and play fight.