Gracy: Genuine Love, Gentle Sorrows

Sorrow, Denial, and Misfortune

When Stacy first started watching UHC season 4 on Graser's perspective she found a certain charm about him. there was something she admired about his charisma during the intro and his quirkiness throughout the season. At first, she thought it was just admiration but it soon became adoration.

Had Tomahawk not killed her in that brutal cruel merciless way a few Hunger Games ago with Joey she wouldn't have gotten contact with Devon. Devon had mentioned having to record UHC that day when they had offered to collaborate and that's when she asked. She then watched that season a month later and tried to get in contact with one of Minecrafters. 

She soon managed to DM Graser, one of the organizers and hosts, and get a reply. They DMed a little day by day until she finally had the courage to ask about UHC and if she could join for the next season. Graser happily invited her and they soon got allowed into his TeamSpeak room. Not long after Graser for whatever reason decided to tweet their conversations because he found her funny and witty. He was often amused by her personality and admired her not thinking much of it. Those who followed him could already tell they would become great friends by the way they clicked within each other's company.

She had thought the UHC group was in their thirties so she didn't question herself when she recognized that she might be starting to directing her affections towards a certain someone. She didn't act upon immediately as she thought it might just be short-lived. She hardly knew the person, she couldn't let her zeal get the best of her.

She had started the Cube on March 2nd two months after UHC Season 5 had gone out and she had gotten more opportunities to enjoy her newfound friend's company. She didn't necessarily join for him but because of him, that is, he had started a multi-player server and she had seen his episodes. She then thought it would be a fun idea to play along with them. It may have meant less spending time with Joey,  and Meghan... but she had never really played anything but Hunger Games, modded Minecraft, adventure maps, and minigames. She wanted a new adventure, and with it being multiplayer if she needed help with crafting or other basic things she could learn from them. She thought it was cool to be part of a larger community as she had only really recorded Joey, Meghan, Shawn, and HotDawg__Princess before, well, mostly Joey. She had a day job it's not like she could just pick different people all the time and them be available. The cube was easier because most of the members were still in high school and had time to collab. Although, now this meant more dedication in actually editing her videos and putting more effort into her content.

It wasn't long before she realized that she was among the two eldest members on the server. Their monthly meetings on the TeamSpeak and mindless remarks during them definitely told her that she was dealing with teenagers or just very childish young-adults. She detested these meetings for that reason. And that's when she decided to forcefully drag her inevitable crush to the back of her mind. Despite all of this she struggled to not love him in that way anymore, and she never did stop. She merely convinced herself that it was nothing but a strong forming bond. Yet despite her efforts to disacknowledge it, this was more than a bond of friendship, it was bondage of love. A zealous love. 

His playfulness around her and pure sound of zest when he spoke to her didn't help. She wasn't sure if it was just his personality towards her or something more. He is a quirky guy and not all that aware of his awkwardness so it could mean nothing she told herself. She was in denial and refused to accept she may be falling for someone much younger than her. 

Unluckily for her- and luckily -he was one of the most available to collaborate with, which years later she found out was because he didn't sleep much and wasn't as busy with school due to the Ontario school system. She enjoyed his company of course but when she saw complaints in her comments section about her only collaborating with him and choosing favorites she knew it was a half-lie when she replied it was hard to get collaborations because some people just happened to be more available than others. She may not have actually chosen favorites for collaborations but she definitely had favorites from collaborations. It was inevitable, it was only human nature to get along with some people better than others, no matter how hard she tried to level it. 

And even if someone offered someone else an adventure through the mesa to find something as lame as a large yellow patch of clay, that someone may not mind if it means spending time with someone they absolutely enjoy to have company with, even if they got lost for an hour. So there goes another thing friendship can do, push you away from other people who aren't as interested in your company. And so friendships bud and others fade. And whenever she did acknowledge her love she could only feel sorrow for herself and her misery. How unlucky could she be?