Want You Back

24.

The memories were haunting me.

The flashbacks, of Luke and before, were choking me.

I couldn't breathe.

I screwed my eyes shut and put my hands over my ears, trying to drown out the sounds, the noise. No relief came, however - I needed to act quickly.

I practiced all the techniques I had been taught over the years - trying to focus on grounding myself, on keeping my mind in the present. I counted my breaths and the time in between each one, trying to keep them constant.

But nothing was helping.

Tears welled in my eyes as I slid off the couch, knocking my bowl of strawberries to the ground with me, the glass bowl shattering upon impact. Bracing myself on the couch, I made it my feet with wobbly knees, bare feet screaming at the glass shards embedded in my skin. The physical pain was nothing compared to the deafening silence in my head.

Pills, I needed my pills.

On shaky, bleeding legs, I made it to the kitchen, tears falling freely from my eyes as my hands blindly searched for the familiar medication bottle.

The pills I so desperately sought were nowhere to be found. But my phone was.

My fingers closed around the sleek device just as my knees gave out, and I fell to the floor with a heavy thud. I felt no pain from the impact though, my brain focussed on protecting my phone from smashing.

With trembling fingers, I unlocked my phone, head throbbing and almost pulsating but still, no pain really registered. My vision was blurred from the tears that were still pooling in my eyes as I tapped around on my phone, selecting an app at random - FaceTime - then a contact.

I don't know why I was suddenly reaching out for help, all I knew was if I didn't hear another human being's voice soon, the panic would win.

"Jasmine? What's u- holy shit." Luke cursed upon setting his sights on his former girlfriend. "Christ," he swore again as he took her in. "What do you need, right now?"

Despite the sheer irony of my random call, I couldn't help but huff a laugh - of course, it would be Luke who I called, and of course, he would know exactly what to say to me.

"I can't find my pills," I all but whimpered, blinking away tears.

"Okay, okay. Take a few deep breaths for me, okay, Princess?" He soothed.

I nodded and tried my best to do as he told me, inhaling slowly with him and holding my breath for a few seconds before finally exhaling.

"Good girl," he praised. "Now, do you know if you still have them with you, or are you out?"

I wracked my panicked brain, trying to remember something but nothing came to me. I shook my head and Luke cursed again under his breath.

"I-I think, um, Priscilla has them." I hiccuped.

Luke ran a hand through his long hair. "Is there a chance she can bring them to you?"

I shook my head again, words failing me for the moment and Luke merely nodded in understanding.

"Okay, do you think you can tell me where you are? Are you in Toronto? New York maybe? LA? Is one of your friends or family members able to help you?"

I brought a hand to my face, fingers tapping against my skin quickly as my hand shook. "Um, I'm in LA," I hiccuped, "my condo."

Luke seemed to breathe a sigh of relief and then he was moving around, making me dizzy. "Please stop moving," I begged.

"I'm sorry, Princess," he apologized in a soft voice. "Can you do me a favour, Jazzy? Do you think you can unlock your door right now?"

"But why?" I asked, head beginning to pound again.

"Because I'm coming to help you, silly."

The pounding in my head made it hard to think properly, and my breathing was still ragged and short. I could barely comprehend the words Luke mumbled to me.

The call suddenly cut off, leaving me to silence once again. I screwed my eyes shut again and brought my trembling hands up to my temples, massaging to try and get some relief.

When that failed, I rolled over onto my stomach, pushing myself up onto my hands and knees. My limbs ached as I slowly crawled to my front door, and screamed when I reached up for the lock, twisting it so it was unlocked.

Feeling incredibly drained from simply moving, I collapsed to the floor once more, barely choking in gasps of air. Tears welled in my eyes once more as my vision started to blur, black spots dancing at the edge of my line of sight.

Then, just as slowly as they appeared, the black splotches took over, until all I saw was black.

Luke cursed as the elevator in his hotel took its sweet time. Glancing anxiously at his phone, Luke swore again and turned sharply, making a beeline for the stairs.

Taking the stairs two at a time from his twenty-sixth floor, all Luke could think of was his ex and how distressed she was at the moment.

Luke tugged his phone out again and called for an Uber, thankful Jasmine's address hadn't changed; he needed to get to her as fast as possible.

By the time Luke made it to the lobby, his Uber was there and ready to go. His entire ride Luke's knee was bouncing up and down and he pulled his lip ring into his mouth, chewing at it anxiously. The short fifteen minute ride felt like an eternity, but then he was there. He was at Jasmine's condo.

Luke raced through the front doors and thankfully was let in by another resident. He made quick time of getting to her front door, and by the time he was standing in front of her door, his heart was racing a mile a minute. The singer took a moment to compose himself and steady his breathing before he knocked on the door.

"Jasmine? Jaz, it's Luke."

No answer.

Luke swore under his breath and turned the knob, relieved when it was unlocked. Those moments of composure could never have prepared him for the sight behind the glass door.