Follow You (Oli Sykes Fan Fiction) COMPLETE

Goodbye London, Goodbye Oli

In early December I got a call that changed my life. My modelling agency in New York needed me to fly back for the 'job of a lifetime'. I wasn't given full specifics, other than that I needed to be in New York in a weeks time.

I don't know how she knew, but Behati called me from New York within 20 minutes of my call from the agency. I could tell in her voice that she was trying to contain herself. Long story short, a massive job had been brought to our agency and they had put forward 6 girls that matched what the customer was looking for. They had picked me from the line up as their first choice and wanted to see me in person on December 10. It might not sound like a huge deal, but the clients were people that change a model's life. People from Vogue. The job paid more than I'd ever earned, and the exposure from being in the pages of Vogue were priceless. It was a dream job and something I couldn't turn down, so I booked a flight back to New York, and just like that, my time in London had an expiration.

I barely slept that night, weighing up everything in my head and trying to grasp how I would stay calm through it all, and even though I shouldn't have cared, I felt sad about leaving London, leaving Oli, leaving that amazing week I'd had with him and his friends. I know he hadn't even bothered to read my messages, text me, call me, anything... but the time that we were together was the best time I had in London, and was always something I would remember. That and I still had the uncomfortable feeling of having not said anything when we parted ways.

I posted a couple of photos to instagram – not giving away everything that I was doing, but hinting at the fact that I was leaving London. I posted a photo of New York with the caption "Home sweet home", one of me with Behati and Hannah that said I couldn't wait to see them again and one of myself pulling a silly pose captioned "Vogue, Darling". I guess I did it because I wanted Oli to see them... I thought maybe it would make him reach out. It didn't.

The night before I was due to fly back to New York, I was sitting on my couch with my bags packed by the door... the apartment empty apart from the furniture and nothing but a mixed bag of excitement, sadness and nerves. I had accepted that everything that had happened with Oli was just a bunch of great memories, and that for whatever reason, our friendship was only ever meant to be short term. I was still however grateful that he'd been there in some really bad moments and had made at least some of my time in London a lot of fun. I don't know why I couldn't just not care, or just forget about him, but I wanted to tell him that I was leaving... not for him to try and stop me, or anything like that, but just because I felt like somewhere, deep past the silence and ignoring me, he would be happy for me. Maybe even proud. I decided that this would be the last time I'd message him, the last time I'd reach out. I would message him to let him know that I was moving back to the US, and if he didn't reply by time I left the UK, I would accept it and let him go. He had made it pretty clear already, and I had to close the book if it was what he wanted. It was 1am when I sent one last DM to him:

"Hey Oli, I just wanted to say Thank you again for caring when I almost gave up here in London. Not everyone would be as kind as you were to me. I landed my dream job in New York so I'm moving back tomorrow, but if you're ever in NYC, let me know and we can grab that coffee."

I hit send and headed for bed. I felt so many mixed emotions that it kept me awake for hours. I tossed and turned before eventually falling asleep in my apartment in London for the last time.

As I pulled the door shut to the apartment in Hendon the next day, I felt emotional. It had been home for almost 8 months, and even though I'd never loved the actual apartment, I loved the memories that I'd made there. I felt tears well in my eyes as a taxi took me through London to the airport and as I sat on the plane on the tarmac at Heathrow just before 5pm, I checked my DM's one more time. That final DM to Oli still sat there, unread, and I'd be lying if I said it didn't break my heart a little bit. I knew it was the end of a chapter. I switched my phone onto flight mode and as the plane's wheels left the ground and the sunset flooded through the window, a tear rolled down my cheek. Goodbye London. Goodbye Oli.