Dear you,
It's been a year.
Are you glad with the damage?
That I literally can't trust people?
I've had countless breakdowns,
Because I'm waiting for the next one to turn,
Someone I truly care about said,
"I would never turn my back on you..."
...I couldn't believe him
It shattered him.
It hurt him!
Because I couldn't trust him!
My best friend,
I don't even trust her like I should.
I watched as tears filled her eyes
When she heard me say that her
"I love you's"
Were lies...
I hurt them.
But can you blame me?
I don't understand!
You taught me to build walls.
Even if they hug you tight,
Promising to never let you go,
That everything is going to be alright!
No.
What you did
I can never forget.
And this has been a weight on my chest,
So I had to scream
I just had to
Because all I felt was sadness
And it's been there for so long
Because of you.
However unlike you,
These friends heard my cries.
They saw my tears,
And instead of giving up
They keep fighting.
Letting me know that they're here
I'm shattered and damaged,
And trying to stay alive,
And these thoughts don't give aid,
But I'm trying to survive.
I can't trust.
That's from a year ago.
But because of you,
I learned to be a strong fighter.
And when you glare at me in the hall,
I can't lie that I feel scared,
But I have to remain strong,
Because I'm better off without the toxicity.
Even though I miss you so much,
And I miss those laughs,
I have to remember that they were fake.
Love isn't damaging someone's brain.
So I have to leave.
And I have to let them break my walls,
Because they love me,
And I'm slowly accepting that.
So I hope as this letter closes,
You might stop and think.
Next time you twist anyone's words,
What damage it will bring.
With care,
An improving me
