resentment - a feeling of indignant displeasure or persistent ill will at something regarded as a wrong, insult, or injury
Your POV
I felt numb. I didn't want to talk. I didn't want to eat. I didn't want to feel. I stayed up all night trying to fall asleep. I found myself wondering around the house until I heard them talking about me.
"You think she caught on?" Jay asked. I silently stood by the door listening.
"I don't think so. Maybe she's just sad," she replied.
"This needs to end soon like asap. You see the way Sir cries for her. We have to get him out of it. Same with Rumi and Blue. She's not normal. She needs to go. I don't see why you reached out in the first place."
"I can't let my reputation get destroyed because of something I did years ago."
"You could literally behead anyone and the people would be like, 'he shouldn't been talking shit'. You have ride or die fans. They would bail you out in like two minutes. They wouldn't care if you had abandoned your child at all," he told her. I took a deep breath and released it. I stood in the door way and looked at them.
"I'll be on the first flight out tomorrow. I'm sorry for making you all feel uncomfortable or disgusted. I should've known better. It's my own fault., so I... I'm sorry," I told them with tears in my eyes. I went back upstairs and book the next flight out for Jess and I. It wasn't going to leave until that night, so I was going to spend the day with my siblings. I roughly rubbed my eyes and slammed my laptop shut. I quietly got my things and Jess' things together, so there wouldn't be anything holding us back from leaving. I carefully picked Sir up and laid him down on my chest. I repeatedly kissed the top of his head and felt the tears rolling down my face rapidly. I silently sobbed.
I managed to cry myself to sleep. I woke up with a stuffy nose, swollen eyes and swollen lips. I looked down to see Sir already looking up at me. He scrunched up his nose and smiled. It made me smile. His stomach growled, so I decided it was time to get up.
"Let's get some food and milk in your tummy," I told him and he clapped his chubby hands together. I changed his diaper and gave him his pacifier. I brushed my teeth, washed my face and went back to get him out of the bed. I picked him up and woke up Blue.
"Wake up. Let's make breakfast and I can do your hair," I told her. She smiled and got up. She sleepily brushed her teeth and washed her face. We went downstairs, I put Sir in his chair and warmed up the bottle of breastmilk that was pumped last night. Once it was warmed, I gave him his bottle.
"What do you want for breakfast?" I asked Blue.
"I want pancakes," she said happily. I made some chocolate chip pancakes from scratch and she enjoyed them. I quickly ran upstairs to give Jess a plate of pancakes with some cut up fruit on the side. I went back downstairs to see them talking to Blue, who wasn't paying attention. I just walked in and just ignored them.
"Sir, would you like applesauce or berries?" I asked him and he reached out for the applesauce.
"And for my princess?" I asked her and she giggled with her bottle still in her mouth. She did the same thing as Sir. I fed them both and once again, Sir made a huge mess.
"Y/N, can we talk?" Jay asked.
"There's nothing to talk about. I'll be gone tonight, so no need to worry. Just let me enjoy my last day with my siblings," I told him as I cleaned Sir up.
"You're leaving today?" Blue asked sadly.
"Yes, your parents don't want my here. So Jess and I will be leaving tonight," I told her. She pushed her plate away and walked over to me. She sobbed in my arms. I tried calming her down, but it didn't work.
