colors • sh

f i f t y - s i x

ℓєє נιнοοи ιѕ ωєακ. Has always been weak. But he wanted to put up a front. He didn't want everyone to see him at his worst times, so he hides them away. He pretends to be strong, like there's nothing that's a problem at all. He pretends like there was nothing that matters to him.

But no, that's not what he feels.

He feels scared all the time. He feels cautious that he'll fail any minute that it will cause his down fall. That it will leave him behind from the others. That he will be left in the shadows.

But when he met Soonyoung, nothing else seemed to matter.

He doesn't care if people push him down. He doesn't care if people even step on him just to reach higher than they have already achieved.

All he cared about was the one male who has loved all he was and appreciate all his flaws. He was the only person he could put his walls down and lean onto his shoulder to cry.

It all doesn't matter to him, as long as he has Kwon Soonyoung by his side. He doesn't care about anything at all.

But, as always, even Soonyoung can be the same as everyone else. He can still bring Jihoon down falling even if he doesn't want to. He can pull Jihoon down. He can still conflict Jihoon pain. And that's how Jihoon's life works. It has always been like that.

Disappoinment.

The scene that Jihoon was unfortunate to witness earlier was something that crashed Jihoon. He had so many thoughts that bounced into his head. So many questions. So many negativities that kept haunting him until the end.

All he could ever think of is why. Why would Soonyoung do this? Why is he with that girl? Why are they holding each other like there's no tomorrow? Why?

Then the answers he could think of aren't the ones he wanted to know.

He still loves her. He can't leave her. They can't live without each other. They love one another.

Jihoon wanted to scream. He wanted to cry out loud from the pain he's feeling.

I hate him. I don't want him. I don't need him.

But why was he feeling like those are lies?

Because they are lies.

He can't think of a day without Soonyoung by his side anymore. He wants Soonyoung. He needs him to the point like Soonyoung is his oxygen that he can't live without.

Jihoon thought they were the perfect two.

He thought that nothing could get in the way of the blossoming romance that they're creating.

Not until today.

"Jihoon!" Jihoon bit his lip. He doesn't want to have more drama in his life. He wanted it to—"go away..." he mumbled. But Soonyoung didn't hear him, or he did but he was stubborn enough to even care.

He caught up to Jihoon and grabbed his arm, so gentle and so warm it sent the same tingle in Jihoon's skin that he can't get enough of.

Jihoon just wanted to fall into his arms at that moment.

He just wanted to forget what happened earlier and just move on.