Falling In Love Will Kill You

Cent cinquante un

I'm Dun- lol

MilkyWay- What? Spill.

TacoHell- R.I.P. my braincells

I'm Dun- So I'm at the store...

Petewentzaway- good job you know how to buy groceries

I'm Dun- ..... and I see this old man laughing at granola bars

Beebo- same

I'm Dun- when he started cackling at the honey oats.... I- I felt that

PierceUrMom- Honey oats are the shit

F*ck- hold on what?

Beebo- Josh saw old man at store, laughing at granola bars, he relate

I'm Dun- should? i? talk? to? him?

Beebo- no

TacoHell- no

F*ck- no

Awsteb- yes

MilkyWay- no

I'm Dun- well the answer is obviously yes

Awsteb- heck ye I'm valid

MilkyWay- when did Awsten get this sort of power?

I'm Dun- wish me luck y'all

Beebo- you should add him to our gc

TacoHell- omg no Josh don't die

Petewentzaway- I'm so confused

Awsteb- I'm valid

Alexa- here's.

Alexa- the motherfucking.

Alexa- t e a

Nicool- oooh please do tell

Alexa- my entire TikTok for you page is filled with grown adults smiling creepily at the camera and I'm afraid that I've accidentally sold my soul to Satan

F*ck- Is Satan messaging you again?

Nicool- AGAIN?!?!

Alexa- Yeah

TacoHell- hold on I think I need some background info cause I'm lost

Alexa- I've sold my soul to Satan and I think we're homies now

Alexa-

F*ck- are you cheating on me?

Alexa- depends who you love more, Taco Bell or me?

F*ck- oh fuck

Alexa- mhm

Wholesome Father- I want childs

Starfish- I need context

Wholesome Father- I like children

Starfish- again context please

Wholesome Father- I'm doing a biology project at the park with my partner Breezy and this little kid asked what we were doing and omg I died inside

Starfish- aww

Wholesome Father- we got him to convince his bully that we are living in a simulation

Beebo- oh my god

Wholesome Father- he was smol boi and he listened to me as I explained time travel in the dr Who universe

Beebo- mini dallon is walking in the streets beware

I'm Dun- I'm back

Awsteb- spilL

I'm Dun- I was talking to the old man and we laughed at granola bars together, it was magical

Starfish- aww

I'm Dun- then I bought him a pack of regular chocolate chip granola bars and this girl that I think goes to our school walked up to us

I'm Dun- apparently she was his daughter and asked me out

TacoHell- WHAT?!

Beebo- what's her name?

I'm Dun- Debby, I think she's in Brendon's theatre class

TacoHell- no u MY fren

TacoHell- mine

TacoHell- did you tell her that you're mine?

I'm Dun- Idk she kinda just walked away with the old man

I'm Dun- I got her number though

Awsteb- oooh congrats

TacoHell- no congrats cause you're mine

I'm Dun- *whispers* but Tyler, we're platonically dating

TacoHell- ye well too bad you're mine

I'm Dun- if we're gonna have this conversation should I bring up Jenna?

TacoHell- nooooo

TacoHell- stop it

TacoHell- ahhh

Beebo- I'm so lost right now

Awsteb- I smell hetero

Beebo- eww

Sarahsmiles- Excuse me?

Beebo- that's the worst timing omg

I'm Dun- Tyler has some non platonic hetero

TacoHell- no u

I'm Dun- the only thing I got was a wink and a phone number Tyler

I'm Dun- you've never even kissed me bro

TacoHell- uh yeah remember the New Years Party?

I'm Dun- that was your taco

Petewentzaway- wait does Tyler have a side hoe?

I'm Dun- oh yeah

TacoHell- wait I thot I was attacking you?

I'm Dun- the tables have turned my fren

TacoHell- no I don't like

I'm Dun- I'm actually the side hoe

F*ck- *spits out tea* wAIT

Starfish- je suis confusion

Beebo- Tyler is a thot

TacoHell- I'm being bullied

*Beebo changed TacoHell user to BbyThot*

BbyThot- I find it very hard to be mad at this brednob

Ryro- What part in human evolution made this group of gay shitposters bring drama to this group chat

Beebo- actually Tyler has a main hetero

MilkyWay- like full course hetero with a side of homo

BbyThot- I'm going find you all in your sleep and steal your ginglymus

Beebo- big world Ryan helP

Ryro- it's basically your knees or elbows, it's the joint

Beebo- did I read joints?

Sarahsmiles- Brendon no

Beebo- Brendon yes

Awsteb- oof