My first immediate thought of waking up: ugh. Like yeah today's meant to be interesting and shit but to be perfectly honest, a day's a day. Nothing makes me feel like wanting to get out of bed anymore, ever since Dad died. 4 months ago my Dad died from a drug overdose, cannabis. I was the one who found his body, since mum was spending Dad's entire drug dealing money. Yeah Dad was also a drug dealer. My older brother, Nick, now runs Dad's little "business" and he reels in all the profits just so Mum can buy new fucking shoes.
Anyway, the night dad died, I came home from a party and I was wasted (I'm 18) and I stumbled into the house, mum was out and Nick probably was with the slut of the week, I found him. Lifeless. Just lying there on the kitchen floor with the overwhelming smell of cannabis. Shit. I called the ambulance but he didn't wake up. He was gone. The police came to our house to inspect it to see if we had any more drugs, thank fuck for Nick hiding the cannabis at the slut's house. Dad was my life. But now he's gone. Forever. And Nick will probably kill himself at some point and I'll be left with mum, well not really. I'll leave her or she'll leave me. But yeah, mum's an alcoholic now. But we do live in a rich part of Georgia.
"Allie wake the fuck up!" My best friend, Emmalie, yelled from the bathroom. She's one of those friends who do care about you but they give you tough love, also, the fact that she couldn't be fucked to get me.
"Ugh." I groaned sitting up on my bed and going straight for my phone to check the time and messages. Shit. (We sleep all day)
"It's 6.40pm get up you lazy hoe, we're gonna see Bring Me The Horizon tonight so you better not embarrass me and not take time to get ready." Emmalie mused while reaching into her make up kit for eye liner. She has light brown, long scene hair, black bmth band tee (authentic of course), black tight rip jeans, black converse and a black choker. Minimal make up -eyeliner, foundation.
"Okay whatever." I get up and go straight to brush my teeth; Emmalie leaves me to get ready and sits down on my bed on her phone (probably playing the Kim Kardashian game smh).
After my shower I began to actually get ready. I haven't been into this type of music for as long as Emmalie but it certainly appeals to me. I don't know every lyric to every song but I know the whole Sempiternal album along with Chelsea Smile, Pray For Plagues and Fuck. I'm wearing my long, dark brown hair down so it touches the bottom of my rib cage in length, black bmth band tee (authentic because Emmalie would probably kill me), black jeggings and black vans, same with the make up.
When we were ready, we got our stuff and got into my car and drove to the venue. We were actually late. I know right. Anyway we got to the gate and handed in our tickets and entered. A Day To Remember was playing and some we're jamming along whilst others were making out or on their phones. Emmalie and I, being the antisocial betches we are, sat down on a bench and went on our phones until the concert actually started. It was an outside event so it was like set in a park. It was a clear night sky.
I suddenly felt someone's hands wrap around my eyes and I smelt a strong scent of cologne. Robert. My boyfriend, you can say he's a douche but he's all I got right now other than the whore next to me, also known as my best friend (love you Emmalie <3)
"Guess who?" Robert's deep voice asks softly and gently into my left ear.
"Oli Sykes?" I asked, going along with his little game.
"Even better." He said nuzzling against my neck.
"You two sicken me." Emmalie sneered and went back to her phone, she hates Robert and so do all my friends.
"When does the concert start?" Robert asks obnoxiously sitting between Emmalie and I. To be completely fair, I don't like Robert and I just haven't ended things yet because I really don't need the stress of his clinginess on my throat so I'm just going to deal with him. FINALLY the concert starts. First song of the night: Shadow Moses
While we were moshing and chanting out the lyrics and the sex god Oli Sykes was screaming, Robert pulled me out of the mosh and we walked away from the venue leaving Emmalie alone- well she wasn't alone-alone since she had other friends there anyway. The concert was pretty much over anyway, BMTH were just performing their last song, Crooked Young. We walked to Robert's car and got into the backseat. We got into a heated make out session until he went for my jeggings, I slapped his hand:
"What the fuck Allie?!" His tone was loud and low. It scared me.
"I'm not ready." I said weakly, suddenly feeling the weight of his stare.
"Well too fucking bad! It's been 6 months of fucking dating and we haven't done anything. I'm sick of waiting, take it as a fucking compliment." His anger grew.
"Robert, please, just not now." I beg, I'm becoming really uncomfortable. My phone is still in my pocket.
"Um how about shut the fuck up. I got a condom anyway." He says completely disregarding my last comment. Asswhipe.
"Um...I got my period. Sorry babe." I tried to make excuses but they weren't very believable.
"I don't mind a little mess." He sneered and began pressing his hands hard against my hips. It hurt so badly, and this was just him holding my waste. He kept going, he tried to get my jeggings off, I looked around desperately for something to use on him. He's robust and tall, he's going to put up a fight. I then saw my opportunity, a plastic spoon. I grabbed it and with all my might I jabbed him in the right eye and that was enough for him to release grip on me and for me to run out of that car. I ran so fast, I'm so going home. If Robert even tries to come to my house, well Nick can easily beat his ass. He knows that too. I got home and the first thing I did was run into the bathroom, locked the door and cried my eyes out. Where's my blade? ...or a banana?
YOU ARE READING
Darkness - a self harm and depressed inflicted fanfic
Fanfiction"I'll kill you!" He sneered as his hot, alcoholic breath hit my skin. I demonically smirked back with no hint of sadness or fear: "Darling... I'm already dead."
