Darkness - a self harm and depressed inflicted fanfic

Chapter Two betch

It's been an hour, I'm still here curled up into a ball and wishing I was never born. Wishing I never went out. Fuck. I'm just another fuck up. I got up and looked at myself in the mirror, the mirror showed a screwed up teenage girl with red eyes and make up running down her face. I can't even recognise myself. It's 11pm and all I want to do is cut, but I promised myself: if I commit suicide, I won't get into heaven. Well that's what my Gran use to say. She's rotting away in a retirement village in California right now.

I got out of the bathroom and went straight to the kitchen, grabbed a knife that had a fine sharp tip and started cutting away my misery. The emotional pain became physical pain. Fuck. I still continued to slice my left wrist until I had 6 thin cuts. I pressed a towel over the cuts to attempt to stop or slow down the bleeding. Okay this is far too painful for me. All I have in my head is Robert grinding on me. I opened the fridge and got out my mum's vodka bottle and stupidly, downed a few shots. The burning sensation was so overwhelming; I put the bottle back in the fridge and went into my mum's medical cabinet. I found some sleeping pills, downed about a dozen of them and walked out drunkenly onto the street.

Don't ask me where I was going, because I don't know. I'm just trying to find an escape. I start to feel the effect of the poly drugs working (poly drug -the use of 2 or more drugs together that make a lethal combination). I start to stumble and fall, my balance is so impaired and I can feel the vomit slowly hovering up my throat. Then I blacked out. Not entirely though, the last thing I saw was some emo kid running towards me. He was so beautiful.

I woke up a few hours later in a clean, white hospital room. I saw Nick by my bedside sleeping with his little slut on the chair next to the bed and mum was outside the room arguing with the doctors trying to find out what happened. I rubbed my head and groaned getting up. Ew I'm in a hospital gown. Mum saw me and ran back into my room and caressed my chin.

"You're so stupid Allie." She said gently yet there was an obvious sense of harshness in her voice.

"Like you care..." I said looking in the other direction. Mum doesn't care, does she?

"Of course I care! Don't doubt my love for you Buttercup." She replied sweetly.

"Okay one, don't fucking call me Buttercup and two, how'd you find me?" I asked confused.

"I found you..." A teenage boy said walking into the room. I've never met him before but he looks familiar.

"Um, do I know you...?" I asked, mum left the room to go back to arguing with the doctors.

"No, but I did save your life so I deserve a thank you." He said smiling walking closer to the bed.

"Um...thanks." I said and raised an eyebrow at this stranger. Damn he was hot; he can save my life any day of the week.

"I'm Alex."

"Allie."

"Well Allie, I'm gonna head off. My friend William (aka Calvin) and I have to shoot some vines. Look me up? Sorry I'm Alex."

"Sorry I'm tired." I said a bit annoyed that he was going to just leave me but then again, he's just a stranger. He nodded at me and walked out.

The doctor came into the room and started lecturing me about the use of poly drugs and shit. Mum was just eye rolling him the whole time which was quite amusing and the nurses were coming into my room every hour to check my heart rate and blood pressure. But all I could think about was Alex. Shit. I got my phone -it was on the bedside table, and opened Vine up. I searched his name. Shit this guy's vine famous. I started watching his vines and then mum walked into the room, I looked up at her and looked outside:

"Shit when did the sun come up?" I asked shocked at how the time literally flew away.

"It's 8am Allie. What were you doing all night?" Mum questioned. Nick and his slut weren't there anymore.

"Oh I was just...nothing don't worry." I mused.

"That boy last night, he's a cutie. He was worried about you, constantly asking if you're okay and everything." Mum said.

-last night at the hospital (Alex's P.O.V)-

Why won't they fucking tell me if she's okay! Fuck! I've been pacing around this fucking doorway for an hour! These dumbass doctors won't even let her fucking mother know if she's okay. Cocksuckers. William was trying to calm me down. Okay I have to admit, that girl who I found was pretty hot but she was in a shit state. Man have I been there before.

"Sir." A stupid, fat, old doctor came up to me.

"Is she okay?!" I yelled in his face.

"She's fine, it's just a bit alarming thought." He said looking down at his clipboard at her files.

"What is?" I asked.

"Her self-inflicted injuries plus the use of poly drugs." He stated and looked back up at me.

"Self-inflicted..." I pretended to know what that meant. Then it hit me.

"Wait, those cuts on her wrist, shit she cut herself!" I was shocked. I knew she was in a shit state but wow.

"Oh and also, there's been evidence of an attempt of rape on her." He continued. Shit she had a bad night.

"Who did that? Do you know his name!? Shit is she okay?!" I threw out all these questions at him. I don't know why thought, I mean I don't even know this girl.

The doctor ended up telling me I had to go but I had to talk to her first.

-back to Allie's P.O.V-

I started to get dressed, just a baggy pair of grey sweatpants and a white v-neck and a pair of black Nikes. My hair was in a messy bun- I was going home. The doctors explained to my mum that I had to be supervised and blah blah blah. But I could go home so thank god. When we got home mum went straight to her vodka and went outside to drink it and I went to FaceTime Emmalie to tell her what happened. She said Robert got arrested. I went on my Twitter account and saw that Alex followed me. Okay then. I then heard a knock at the front door. I answered it.

"Hi."