Swimming in a pool of sad emotions, sinking in pain, drowning in confusion, there's peace in darkness, there's life in my loneliness, I see love in betrayal, I hide behind silence, I dive into this silence, this darkness I have come to find shelter in, I do it because alone is all I have known, i do it because im my own friend, I learned how to be that in a world full of cruel people, but not even my isolation from the world, my pool of deranged emotions could prepare nor protect me from heartbreak, I was just as vulnerable as the next person who thought they'd be able to avoid it, to counter it. Im just wondering if now I can conquer it. In my dark hole I always found peace, but now I want to dive into a different existence, get pushed by the waves into another forever, a different Infinity, a forever with a different kind of peace, a darkness that holds beauty, a pool that sinks me into good emotion. A darkness that is fulfilled, a darkness that conquers what is hollow and makes me whole, a darkness that craves happiness and strives for peace and comes to terms with love. A darkness where I can see myself in the light of the blackness, see through my heart. Fall in love with my surroundings, I want to fall in love with me. I don't want to only be able to sink myself into another Infinity because of solitude, but because of the strength of love that carves that solitude, I want to swim around and feel the beauty of a darkness dissolved in purity where I feel immune to hate and pride because I'd know I'm surrounded by love and best of all waters filled with much more than life but a wise and happy soul, one that can make me whole without avoiding pain but embraces all it's cuts and bruises so they can lead my currents to peace once again. I crave fulfillment. Not to be more than or better than what I was but to just leave, be away from all that's haunting me. I want to look them straight in the eyes and make peace with all my demon's. To live in a world among them and not feel a sense of torture at their presence, but to be content because as they float around they'd no longer exist because my peace would remain that and they'd never be able to break me again.
