The what the heck novels (Wattys 2014)

Started from the desert now I have a castle. (Not)

Note: This book makes 0 sence and will leave you more confused than you ever will be. This book is not edited to make it more confusing.

Disclaimer: I am not in charge of any mental damage done to you or any loved ones during the action of this book. Enjoy!

    Anna woke up in her room. No, that's not her name, it's too mainstream. We need a interesting name. Summersberry? No, that's aready taken. Ana? What is this, Frozen? Adelice?  Nope, too proper. How about Kevin? Nah, we can't name a girl kevin. It interferes with the circle of life. We need a name that has not been used lately. How about Anaya? Yes, that'll do. Okay, let's start over.

    Anaya woke up in her room. As she looked at the window,she saw a man standing outside her window. He was most likely poor. He had a red fez on with a purplish vest. Then, Anaya remembered. They we're on the second floor. How is he out here? He reached out his head to her. Like any cliche girl on wattpad, she ignored the fact that she was leaving with a random dude. He yanked her outside. The strange man pulled her down on the magic carpet and started to sing.

             "I can show you the world.."

             "come again?" Anaya asked. The guy looked like something straight out of a disney movie that she have never watched.

            "Shining shimmering splended. Tell me princess, when was the last time you let your heart decide?"

         " What are you talking about? I am not a princess! I am just a stupid cliche wattpad girl who chose to be taken away by a guy in a fez. Are you a pedophile? Are you going to dominate me and force me to kiss you every time a boy comes in a two mile radius of me?"

         " I can open your eyes, take yo-" BAM. "Answer me you dolt, who are you!" Anaya snapped, allowing her hand too attack his face. The man looked confused. As if he actually thought stealing someone from their home, fly them away, and not cause udder chaos. Get it? Udder? There's no joke, a ha ha ha. :)

       Suddenly, the man stopped the flying carpet and pushed her off the carpet. The monkey wearing a red fez, that Anaya totally noticed, gave Anaya the Never-mess-with-prirnce-Ali look and jumped off the carpet. Noticing this, the guy shouted, "Abu!" and tried to grab him.

        It was a slow motion moment. The guy was about to grab the very fur of Abu's tail when the slow motion stopped and he missed grabbing Abu by a foot. Anaya however, had landed on a conviently placed camel. caught Abu in her hand,  and sat on a guy. He was most likely a grand adviser, according to his outfit.  The man was holding a snake septer with ruby eyes. That thing must be cursed! Hey, let's take it from that man and keep it for no good reason! Anaya thought in her head.

    Have you ever wondered why I can hear the voices in my charenter's head? Me either.

  Anaya grabbed thing snake thing and hopped back on the camel. Abu climbed on her head. The camel started to move. They walked past many things in the desert. A weird lions thingy with it's mouth open. A bunch of ponity stuff shaped like pyraminds, and a spinx thing. Anaya was very confused at this. So she asked the camel for guidance.

     "Hello"

     " Good day missus. My name is bfcdinbcdinbdrnbdreberd. It means the name that changes every time you type it in nigjoggfboespi, my native languge.It also changes every time you type it. Since I am a magical camel, I also have the god given talent to read quickly. I have noticed that I don't like these recent books being published.  Do you like the Hunger Games? I don't. I mean, who wants to read about a world where people want people to die on T.V.? You might as well watxh Honey Boo Boo for an hour and try not to be mentally disturbed."

   "That's a mouthful. Anyway, where are we going?"

  "It's not where were going,it's when." pdbxcdbcduvcduvcdwivxs said, with a grin on his face. Then it dawned on her. It's not about where we're going, it's not about how we get there, it's not about why Anaya is learning a random lesson right now, it is not about any of that. Heck, it's not even about when are we going. It's about absoulutly nothing. In fact, this entire paragraph is meaningless. It doesn't mean anything to this story whatsoever. The concept of this blew her mind so much that she threw Abu across the desert, never to be seen again.

    "Wow." Anaya said. "It's about time I did that. Don't regret it at all."  All he did was sit on her head and make her head hurt. Plus, he didn't even talk. We have a talking camel but no talking monkey?

   After many days of walking through vast sand, more vast sand, and even more vast sand. The duo got out of the desert. This would have been shorter if Anaya would've shut her blabbering mouth and noticd he was making fdvfudvdegbifebcibcdfio walk in a circle. But who cares? They finally got out of the desert so this story can move on. Soon they  stopped at a village. The place looked like a old scandinavsh town. Or what should be a scandinavish town. It was covered in snow. Wait, didn't they walk out of a desert three minutes ago? They walked up to a small man who looked like he'd know a thing or two.

    "Hello sir, what happened here?" bcdfuvcdkuvSCDBSXWQIBVDSIX asked. Not wondering why a camel is talking to him, the man jumped up in fury.

    "SHE'S A WITCH!!!" The man screamed." The queen is a witch! She created magic out of her hands!" His face turned red as a tomato. If this was a cartoon, smoke would be coming out of his ears. A taller man, with soft eyes and dark red hair, came running at the shorter man."Duke! It's okay. We raided her castle and took Queen Elsa, remember?"

    Anaya stood there, watching this all unfold. Wanting to take her head away from this drama, she spotted a castle. The most amazing castle that is so indescribable that if we even tried to describe the color of it, it would be as worthless as that other paragraph. Catching her glimpse, the red haired man explained to  her," That's our queens castle that she made. We are going to move the kingdom there when me and my fiancee marry. We have  another castle, but we decided to have the one on the mountain."

    " What happened to the other castle?" vcdfbivdafbidabiolcdfcdxv asked. Not caring that he is a camel, he answered the question.

     " A man on a flying carpet crashed into the castle. Creating a gaping hole. When we found him, he was hugging a monkey saying 'Abu! Why did you have to go? Why?' We put him in a hosiptal for the insane. If you want the castle, you can have it. Plus the other castle changes color depending on my mood!"

 (Have you ever noticed that in Frozen? The castle turned yellow when Elsa was being attacked. Which might be the color it turns when shes mad. It turned purple when Elsa struck Ana with ice.which could be the color it turns when she's sad. When she sang Let it go, the castle was blue. Which means she was happy.)

     "Seriously?" cdibcfeibfcdiobfc said

     "Did you read the last paragraph? Yes, it does."

     "No, I mean we get to have the castle?"

       " No, you get to have a bowl of spinach."

       "Yes!"

      After getting thier bowls of spinach, Anaya and drbrdurfdvou flew into the sunset and were never seen again.

                                         THE END:D

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   Thank you for reading my story. I hope you're not too confused.

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