The what the heck novels (Wattys 2014)

Remember the cobra staff?

        Anaya crouched down to see the dead rug. She sighed with sadness. How was see supposed to reenact a whole new world now?  Two down, one to go. Hopefully it'll be a girl this time. She thought as she plucked carpet from the ground.

   Anaya, with bibcai asasvuv walking behind her, walked to the dying hole. The dying hole was like a graveyard in this world. It took away the souls of things and took them to the banana king for judgment.

      Once arriving in the dying hole, Anaya looked down at its contents. It was a cast pit of nothingness that stretched as far as the eye can see. You can still see the corpse of other carpet that has been put to rest here. They were brown and well burnt.

     With one pitiful glance at carpet, she threw the rug into the pit of sorrows. Then, she took a match that she for some reason had in her pocket and lit it. Anaya always loved the scent of fire. The way it burned so brightly yet could kill in a flash. She once read a book where a man could control the fire so it would lick his fingers but he isn't that important to the plot. (Note not that important.)

   As the fire fell into the hole, it left a small trail of light behind it. It was the tiniest flare that busted into a mountain of FIRRRE!

  The deed done, Anaya turned to bnobvfoberfiBIBESDI. "Now what?" She asked. Bdydcuwsoabsaogbsau shrugged. Without another word, the camel picked up Anaya and flew off.

   After flying for and time and talked about Scotland's national animal, the duo decided it would be great to see some of the ancient castles there. Upon landing in the UK Anaya saw something very peculiar.

  She deemed it was nothing important and carried on.

Vdsuvdxsusdvu and Anaya walk through an old village square. They sold various kinds of jewelry that look very unappealing to her. But to be nice, she bought a purple crystal necklace. She swung it over her neck. The stone seemed to glow once it made contact with her skin. But of course that won't be important till later.

 Uybdisubidsbibi was enjoying everything the town has to offer. He awed at the wood makers craftsmanship, gasped at the lancing, and weeped when the actors killed that one guy in a live reenactments of some play none's heard of. Though he was having a blast, he couldn't shake off the feeling that someone somewhere is watchi-PLUNK.

  A red headed Scottish girl tackled dyubcdudbseu to the mucky ground. She looked like someone of royal descent. Her dress is a dead give away. Her movements were quick and barely comprehensible.  In a matter of a few minutes, the girl had him tied up and she was dragging the poor animal into the darkness.

 Good day, beautiful people! I'm Joe Na with the breaking news. Freddie Gray is gone, but no one knows him so screw that! Also there was an earthquake in Nepal. Some people died. An idiot police guy decided to beat the living daylights out of a girl on camera. And that's it for now! This is Joe Na and have a great day folks!