DIARY - XU MINGHAO [Completed] [Under Editing]

CHAPTER 17- Promise

Minghao P.O.V.

Today is saturday a boring saturday. I turned my head on the bedside table and saw the pink diary. I decided to pick it up and lay on my bed as I read another page.

Hey diary! It's been quite while since I last wrote here. Today is not like the other regular day, I feel a bit sad. I suddenly realized that I'm so dumb liking someone, I mean why would I have to fall for anyone if I couldn't have them just like the others. This appeared to my mind after hearing the rumours in my school. Don't really have the mood to talk about it but, how can I hide something from you? As I was saying, the rumours I heard from the school is that my lovey dovey crush was dating someone. I heard from the others, that he was dating his best friend the almost perfect angel kyulkyung. Wow, I don't know if I should believe it but, whatever I feel it doesn't matter. It's not like it's gonna change my fate anyway. You're probably seeing my face right now as I wrote this. I am actually crying right now, how pathetic. But pathetic or not, I wish I could be like other normal people. No sick, nothing to worry about, nothing to be scared of. I wish there's someone I could lean into right now. Where are you all?

This diary never failed to hurt me. But, it also never failed to be amazed by how brave this girl is.

I can't imagine having no one to lean into, feels like I'm being sorrounded by a lot of indifferent people.

This girl is all hurt and alone, and I'm also one of the reason why she's hurt. I felt bad after realizing that, how can I be so insensitive?

As I think of hurt, I suddenly remembered Lacey. That she was hurt because of me lying to her. Everytime it came to my mind, there's a vague feeling I couldn't point out. Like I already hurt her even before, I don't know why I'm feeling this.

I picked up my phone and stared at Lacey's phone number. I wanted to do something and break this irritating feeling.

I took a deep breath before pressing the call button. After a few rings, she finally picked it up.

"hello?" her voice rang on from the phone.

"oh Lacey, I'm sorry if I bothered you"

"no it's fine, is there something wrong?"

"uh... Do you mind hanging out with me? Later?"

"oh, I would love to but, I still have a few things to finish. Sorry.."

She's still mad right?

"are you still mad at me?"

"hm? Mad at you? I'm not mad at you"

"about last, last night?"

"nah, I'm not. Just... That you know" she said then there's silence. We're confused who's turn to talk. "uh, I really need to go now. Let me talk to you again later?"

"yeah, sure."

"thanks, bye~"

"sorry..." I said too late to let her hear it.

I sighed in frustration. Already annoyed at myself.

Why am i so stupid?

***

Lacey P.O.V.

I put down my phone and continued doing some of my unfinished homework. I got stopped from writing when I remember his invitation. I really wanted to tag along but, I'm trying my best to stop this feelings. I don't want to feel like this anymore, I really don't want to pity myself again. The more I got close to him, the more I keep falling and thinking that I would stand a chance. But the truth is I'm too far from the chance.