𝐏𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 ✄𝐧𝐢𝐤𝐤𝐢 𝐬𝐢𝐱𝐱

✄ 31 ✄

Santa Barbara, 1986
(Gwen's point of view)

'Fuck! These heels are killing me!' I thought to myself.

It was the day of Tommy and Heather's wedding. Many people from friends to family had attended the ceremony with smiling faces. Well, almost.

The wedding went amazing except for the fact that I had to walk with Nikki down the isle. He looked absolutely handsome in his tuxedo but the drowsed look on his face made him look like he wasn't into the ceremony. He looked like he was forced to be there. I kept my eyes on his the entire time wanting to know what was wrong with him but I wasn't mentioned any information about him until it was time for the reception.

I kept myself close to Chrissy with a glass of champagne in my hand. Everyone was huddled around Tommy and Heather until he spoke up and looked over the small crowd.

"Gwen!" Tommy smiled. "Get your skinny ass over here! We need a picture!" He called to me.

I chuckled to myself and handed over my glass to Chrissy. I quickly tip toed my way over to him and Heather in my high heels I wore in the wedding.
"Hey! Best man!" Tommy yelled for Nikki.
"Get Mick and Vince over here! We're getting a picture!"

I looked at Heather as she looked as stunning as ever. She gave me an excited grin before Vince and Tommy made their way in between us.
"Don't mind me, sweetheart." Vince said adjusting himself so his hand laid at the small of my back.

Even though Vince was more respecting than he was before, his hand being there made me have an unsettling feeling in the pit of my stomach.

Instead of telling him that I was uncomfortable, I smooth out my navy blue dress and put my arm behind Vince's back.

"Nikki," I heard Tommy say abruptly.

I shot my head to look at the bass player. The look on his face made it seem like he was about to vomit. His skin was more pale than mine and his hair covered his eyes, probably shielding himself from the attention he was now receiving.

Tommy held a look of disbelief before looking to Mick for help. The guitarist then used the point of his elbow to jab it into his bandmate's side, making his head spring to life and his eyes go wide.

I saw Nikki taking notice to the cameras around us, so he fixed himself and made a small smile on his lips. Everyone could tell he was trying too hard when the pictures were being taken. I didn't know what was wrong with him until Vince took notice to the look on my face.

He leaned over enough to whisper in my ear. "I wouldn't go near him. He just shot up gear not too long ago."

I let my mouth part and my eyes narrow. Nikki shot up heroin at Tommy's wedding. Are you fuckin' kidding me.

I knew he was fucked up, but I didn't know he was that fucked up. That was uncharted territory for most of us. I didn't know what to expect from him until now. He was so selfish to do this to Tommy. This was a new low for him to show up at his best friend's wedding high as a kite.

I tore my eyes off of him to let them go to the camera lenses in front of me. I could feel my heart dropping to that stomach with each flash that was being made.
How could he do such a thing? Especially to his dearest friend and band mate.

After the pictures were taken, the night had fallen, and it was time to mingle and dance to our heart's content.

The hotel their reception was at had a huge dance floor outside with lights strung over our heads. With the night view of the beach next to us, we were all in somewhat perfect harmony.

I was sitting at the table where the bridesmaids and groomsmen sat. Everyone laughed and had a grand time with one another. Instead of enjoying the others, I was helping myself to the hotel beers. I was being a loner for the time being and I wasn't really in the mood to be disturbed. I had a four beer streak going on and I was on my fifth one.

'Nothing can stop me now.' Or so I thought as I guzzled down on the freshly opened bottle.

I was occupying my hands with my beer until I felt a tap on my shoulder, making me turn my head to the last person I'd least expected to talk to me.

"Hey." Vince said.

"Hi." I muttered, giving him a slight smile.

I tapped my fingers on the glass of my beer to amuse myself.

"Wanna dance?" He asked.

I hummed a laugh and narrowed my eyes. "What's the catch?"

He shook his head. "No catch. Just wanting to dance with a dear friend of mine."

I chewed on my bottom lip to think thoroughly, but what was there to think about? It was only a dance with Vince.

I nodded my head, figuring it would just be one dance then back to the drinking game I was playing by myself.
"Okay." I nodded my head slowly.

I sat my alcoholic beverage on the clothed table and grabbed Vince's hand that he had stuck out. He led me to the center dance floor and put his arm around my waist while the other attached to my hand.

We started swaying to the song All You Need Is Love by The Beatles. I hummed to the tune and started letting my eyes adjust to the solid black of Vince's jacket. I let my attention be caught by him. In response he released a deep chuckle.

I finally had the courage to look him in the eyes and furrow my eyebrows. "What?" I questioned.

He shrugged. "Nothing really. You just look like you're in deep thought."

"Well, not really." I shook my head and smiled shamefully.

"You and I have been up each other's ass for an entire tour. I know when you're in deep thought about something, and I usually know what you're thinking about." He admitted.

Again, I smiled shamefully at him. He raised his eyebrows at me. "Or who you're thinking about."

I disconnected my eyes from his to land on his shoulder. "If you're that upset with him then talk through it. Maybe it'll straighten him up a bit."

I shook my head. "Nothing can help him now."

Vince frowned but I let myself continue to talk. "He made his choice and ever since that day at his house." I struggled to get the words out but Vince stopped me.

"It doesn't matter what happened last year, Gwen. What matters is what he's willing to do for you." I looked up to him a bit skeptic of his words. "I mean, yeah. He was waving a gun around and he could've hurt you but it wasn't his intentions. You know how he really is."

"The Nikki I knew back then wouldn't have to wave a gun around to protect me. He was there for me back when we were together and now he's gone. There's no way of getting him back." I shook my head.
"Not now, and probably not ever."

I didn't want to face the fact that the old Nikki wasn't coming back but I forced myself. It was hard to do but I had finally told myself enough times to get it through my thick skull.

Just like Frankie, the old Nikki was dead. And there was no turning back.