I Was Loved | Jordi GDL

30

I looked at my phone and sighed. I'm sorry God, I kept on lying. I wanna tell him the truth but I don't know how. I'm thinking about the possibilities, sure my conscience will stop bothering me na but what if Jordi gets mad at me? I'm kinda scared. I don't want that to happen, he's the only thing that makes me happy. Life is so cruel to me.

Why does my parents need to argue all the time? Why does my brother needs to suffer from his trauma again? He got his trauma when we were still a kid. My mom and dad used to fight a lot. My mom suspecting my dad to have a mistress because my dad rarely goes home.

"I am brave." I whispered to myself.

I took a glance at my phone again and a notification popped up. Ngumiti ulit ako, my heart started to pump rapidly, I know this is Jordi.

8:22 PM

Jordi:
Coach, sir dale needs us to be in the court at 6

he can't contact you daw po

"I think I really need to tell him the truth." I said to myself.

But no.

I can't afford Jordi being mad at me.

I started typing my reply pero I can't compose a message.

I stood up then leaned into the wall. I can see the stars from here. Ang ganda, stars proved me that there's always a light in the dark.

I decided to leave Jordi's message unreplied and as soon as I tucked myself in the bed, I can hear mom and dad shouting again.

"Fine! If that's what you want, let's separate!" I heard dad's voice. A lone tear fell from my eye. I can hear mom crying.

"If that's what you really want, then so be it. Tinitiis ko lang naman para sa mga anak ko! But Ann, believe me I love you. Sobra pa sa alam mo. I am working my ass off, I don't get along with girls, if that's what you think. But you're too much, I try to go home every weekends pero puro sigaw lang ang inaabot ko sa'yo." My dad said, his voice cracking. I know he is already crying. I quickly went out of my room then went inside my brother's. What if my brother experience break down again? I know my brother is a bully but I love him so much.

I got my nerves relaxed a bit when I saw my kuya sleeping. Buti nalang he's not bothered with all the noise.

May narinig akong pagbagsak ng kung ano. I know it's from my parents' room. Naglakad ako papunta sa kama ng kuya ko saka tumabi sakanya. I hugged my kuya, as much as I wanted to wake him up and talk to him, I decided to just let him sleep so he won't hear anything from mom and dad.

Siniksik ko yung mukha ko sa dibdib ni kuya habang nakayakap ako sakanya. This is my favorite spot. I was in the middle of sobbing when I realized that my brother isn't moving.

"Kuya..." I tapped his shoulder. He didn't respond.

"Oh my God, kuya..." I pushed him gently.

"Kuya!" I shouted. I cried. He's still breathing but he's unconscious.

"God, please help." I prayed. I was shouting already but no one gets to notice me.

"Manang!!!" I tried once again, this time, louder.

"Help!" I cried.

"Kuya, please don't..." I sobbed.

[A/N: Sorry weird ko magisip ng plots huhu]