( a:n every now and then it hits me that i'm the one that got away )
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you can pretend you don't miss me (me)
you can pretend you don't care
all you want to do is kiss me (me)
oh what a shame i'm not there
you can pretend you don't miss me (me)
you can pretend you don't care
all you want to do is kiss me (me)
oh what a shame i'm not there
how do i even start? grayson well is grayson and Otho get will ever change that. maybe it's for the better or worse? who knows? but my experience with grayson has been hell of an experience. an experience i will never forget. that's all i can really say. he'll i'll never even forget his face. you might think he's dead or some shit by the way i speak about him but he's actually well and alive. it's just he's well not all in my life anymore. it's alright though? i guess? because it's his chose you know. people come and go all the time in my life and he chose to go. although we are on and off a lot of the time so sometimes he just pops back up into my life without a warning or anything. that's when my feelings come back for him. every single time. sometimes i just wish i could get over him. we aren't what's best for each other because if we were we would of been officially together by now. not to sound cocky or anything but i know he misses me as i much as i miss him. which is sadly a lot. he can pretend he doesn't care but we both know he does. i know he still wants me oh what a shame i'm not there. how do i know all this you may ask? well i have little birdies telling me all of this. me and gray still have some mutual friends that are both friends with me and gray so that's how i get all my info on gray. me and gray's mutual friends tells me that grayson talks about me a lot and he always talks about me. which makes me quite flattered honestly. i still talk about him too to be honest it's not all good though. i do also say a lot of shit about him too. the funny thing is whenever i see him in public or some shit he acts like i don't exist. which honestly kinda hurts but he can pretend he that he doesn't care all he wants but deep down inside i know he still does care.
what is it you want?
you can lie but i know that you're not fine
( oh yeah )
every time you talk
you talk 'bout me but you swear i'm not on your mind
the question that still roams mind is. what is it he wants? he can lie to me or his friends but i know he's not fine. i can tell when something's wrong with him. it seems like every time he talks he talks 'bout me but he swears i'm not on his mind. makes me a little confused. does he still love me? but he just doesn't want to admit it? what is it? i wonder why i still roam his mind. maybe i was a little bit special to him after all? hopefully i have spent so much time and love into that boy. it's unreal how much i care for him. you would think since we are always on and off i wouldn't love him anymore but i sure as hell still do. i just wish things between me and gray would have worked out. i know me and him still somewhat love each other but it's just that we aren't meant for each other. it just seemed to take a long time for us to figure that out.
you can pretend you don't miss me (me)
you can pretend you don't care
all you want to do is kiss me (me)
oh what a shame i'm not there
there's nothing more i want in the world then for me and gray to be together. i just really wanted things to work out between me and gray. you know i felt like he was actually the own for me. i just it sucks life doesn't always turn out the way you want it too. i wonder if gray did actually truly love me. i hope he did because i sure as hell did love and still love him. i know gray always pretends that he doesn't miss me and pretend he doesn't care but everyone knows he still does. gray still looks at all my social medias and shit. it's just i honestly really don't know how to feel. i just so badly wish there was something i could do to salvage me and gray's relationship. sadly there's nothing i can do nor can he do. it is what it is and there's nothing we can do to change that.
everybody knows
you and i are suicidal stolen art (oh yeah)
pretty moments sews
stitches into all your bitches broken hearts
me and gray had a lot in common. that's why i thought we would of worked out but apparently we had a lot of differences that i didn't know about until later into whatever the hell we were. whenever me and gray got into arguments in broke my heart each time. i wish i could of fixed that but i couldn't only he could. as you probably guessed he didn't fix it either nor did he even try to fix it. it was always me fixing shit and getting is back together because we i truly did want things to work out between us. the only thing i use to think about was grayson. i know obsessed much? but he'll i'm going to be honest i was. i thought he was the love of my life and i prayed we would have worked out but we just didn't. i went through hell and back just to try to make us work but it didn't and that's because it takes two people to make a relationship. ( *cough*cough* take notes ) all the good moments we had does not make up for all the bad times we had. i just remember a bunch of yelling, screaming, throwing things, and most of the time our arguments ended up with one of us leaving the house. i always wondered where he went but i could tell as soon as he came home. the bar. he fucking reeked of alcohol when he came through that fucking door. gray would always come in stumbling and slurring his words. talking about literal nonsense and i always had to guide him to bed. make sure he's comfortable and make sure he doesn't have a hangover in the morning. i always went through thick and thin to fucking help gray but what has he done for me? you know he's really good at running away from his problems. never once did he attempt to fix them. he's the first person to break my heart and he'll be the last.
you can pretend you don't miss me (me)
you can pretend you don't care
all you want to do is kiss me (me)
oh what a shame i'm not there
honestly it just fucking confuses the hell out of me that he says all this shit now about how he still loves me but yet in the relationship did nothing to show me he loves me? got me extremely fucked up. it's just why was i so dumb enough to believe that grayson actually loved me? he doesn't love me and he'll never love me it's clearer to me now.
somebody new
is gonna comfort you
like you want me to
somebody new
is gonna comfort me
like you never do
he's probably already found somebody to comfort him like he wanted me to. i just ask myself where did we go wrong? i thought we were fine but i guess we weren't. little does he know somebody new is gonna comfort me like he never did.
every now and then it hits me
that i'm the one that got away
but i guess being lonely fits me
and you were made for beg and stay
i tend to think every now and then that i'm the one that got away. did i make a mistake leaving him? what would of happened if i decided to stay? maybe being lonely fits me? maybe grayson was just mace for beg and stay...
( a/n hola people's i wrote this imagine a long time ago but never finished it because i didn't know where to go with it anyway it's done now )
