Because I Love You

17| Flowers for Miss Tia

"You know, girl, I think Trav has all the rights to be mad at you naman," Lacey said, nodding her head a little, while playing with her cake.

I raised a brow on her. "Lace, I never do anything to offend him or to damage our relationship. I'm a faithful girlfriend!"

"Yeah. Yeah, Tia. But you know, sa inyong dalawa... you never give him assurance e. If I were him, I'll feel the same. Palagi na lang kasi na s'ya 'yong vocal sa feelings n'ya and you're always his priority. While you... you're a little selfish kasi. Palagi ka n'yang pinagbibigyan kaya ayan, now that he's being a little demanding, nagagalit ka."

I huffed. "Ano ba naman kasi ang magagawa ko d'on, 'di ba? I don't have the control over that guy's mind. Ano ba'ng magagawa ko kung palagi s'yang nakabuntot sa akin? Sa tingin mo ba na-e-enjoy ko 'yon?" Naiinis na sabi ko. "Palagi ko 'yong pinagtatabuyan. Palagi kong tinatarayan. Pero makulit ang bungo n'on e."

I raked my hands through my hair out of frustration.

Nagagalit si Travis sa akin ngayon dahil may nakakita sa akin na kaibigan n'ya sa isang coffee shop kasama si Brandon. When he called me I lied about my whereabouts. Alam ko kasi na pagtatalunan lang namin 'yon.

Sa isang subject namin ay nagkaroon ng activity na kailangan ng partner. I was out on the restroom when the professor announced about the groupings. That asshole Brandon paired us up without my permission. Kung ako lang, I can manage to do everything on my own.

Since it was a grouping, kung ano ang grade ni Brandon ay iyon din ang magiging grade ko. I can do everything on my own but I have to explain everything to him, so that he can get a good grade as well.

I decided to meet Brandon in a coffee shop to brief him about our activity. Unfortunately may nakakita na kakilala ni Travis at nag-sumbong agad sa kanya. I am not doing anything wrong but I chose to lie because I want to finish my meeting right away. Ayoko nang nakakasama nang matagal 'yong lalaki na 'yon.

Kung umamin ako kay Travis pagtatalunan pa namin 'yon. At matatagalan lang ako sa coffee shop kasama 'yong si Brandon. At isa pa ayoko na magka-hint si Brandon na mag-aaway kami ni Trav. I'm sure he'll tease me more.

"So dahil sa tingin mo na 'di mo kasalanan at nagmamatigas si Travis ngayon, ganyan na lang kayo? Hindi na kayo mag-kakaayos dahil sa pride?" Lacey smirked. "Thinking about it, it was always Travis who make moves to fix every arguments. It was never you."

Sumimangot ako sa kaibigan ko. "Sinasabi mo na 'di ako nag-e-effort?"

"What I was saying, Tia, is that you have to understand him din naman. You're too self-centered. Given naman na sa'yo umiikot ang mundo ni Travis. Pero abusado ka naman."

I gasped at Lacey's strong words. I am offended.

"Don't look at me like that." Inunahan na ni Lacey ang pagsasalita ko. "Totoo naman. Ano ba ang ipagmamalaki mo na nagawa mo for Trav? You gave yourself to him? Duh! Most girls fantasize about that, 'no!" Padabog na ibinaba ni Lacey ang inumin n'ya sa lamesa at mas hinarap pa ako. "Don't be too confident, Tia. Hindi porke't mahal na mahal ka ni Travis ay ite-taken for granted mo na s'ya. Think about it. Kailan lang ba s'ya humihirit sa'yo? Compare mo nga 'yon sa lahat ng beses na ikaw ang pinagbibigyan n'ya."

"Hindi naman gan'on nasusukat ang pagmamahal, Lacey." I reasoned.

We're old enough to know practicality. Magkalayo na nga kami, magiging unreasonable pa s'ya? At napaka-simple lang naman ng pinag-aawayan namin. It's not as if I was caught kissing somebody else!

Kung sa akin makakarating na may kasama s'yang ibang babae sa kung saanman, I won't be mad. Dahil normal naman 'yon! Lalo na kung ka-eskwela n'ya.

"Nakakatakot ka mahalin, Hestia Marein Gamido." Lacey rolled her eyes. "If I were Travis, baka matagal na kitang hindi mahal. It's like you can live without his love. You're always about reasons, practicality, and priorities. Nasaan ba s'ya sa buhay mo? You're always using your head over your heart. Kita mo nga, pati buhay ni Travis ikaw na rin ang nag-de-decide. And he's letting you. He took that MBA because you wanted it. Tapos ganitong bagay lang 'di ka pa mag-give in sa kanya. Ano ba 'yong si Trav naman ang suyuin at intindihin mo? So what kung unreasonable para sa'yo 'yong ikinatatampo n'ya? Isipin mo na lang na malayo 'yong tao sa'yo at malungkot 'yon d'on. And you lied, remember?"