Because I Love You

22| Impulsive Decision

"Love," I forced out a smile as I looked at Travis.

He was stunned to see me.

My heart ached at the tiredness and loneliness dancing on his eyes. He got dark circles under his eyes and he looks really tired.

When I walked out on the President's office, I saw Terrence waiting for me at the lobby. The boy volunteered to take me to his brother.

"I think you have to talk to Kuya," Terrence said as we were on the way here. "Convince him to stay. Because he's needed here."

I looked at Terrence with parted lips. Will he be saying those hurtful words like his father?

Terrence sighed. "I know you're smart. You can understand the situation. Our company have failed investments. Those weren't enough to bankrupt the AGC, but Dad's debts are." He sighed once more. Taking everything seriously. "Yesterday, our mother had a heart attack. Just last week, our properties have been sold to pay for half of Papa's debts. Two days ago, Kuya wants to leave to be with you. He's turning his back on the family. Said he doesn't care if our parents will disown him. Mama has been heartbroken with that. And yesterday, my stupid twin had an accident, and he doesn't want to see his family. Can you imagine how heavy everything is for our mother?"

I want to say that it's their fault. Pabaya silang mga magulang. I can't blame Troy. Their parents were always away. Kahit nga birthday nila ay 'di makapagbigay ng oras ang mga magulang nila.

But part of me feel sorry for their mother.

"Kuya is avoiding you because he knows that he'll be willing to leave Mama for you. Isang kita n'ya lang sa'yo, ikaw na agad ang desisyon n'ya. Kung aalis ka, aalis din s'ya. Kahit pa kailangan s'ya ng kompanya at ni Mama," Terrence added.

Sa titig ni Terrence sa akin, alam ko na agad na may gusto s'yang ipahiwatig.

"And you're saying those things to me and bringing me to him because?" I asked, nervous.

"I am begging you to leave him. He can't leave you, but you can. You're going to build yourself, right? Leave him here. He's needed here. Mama needs him. Mama won't need another stress."

"You're cruel," I cried.

I am crying because I can understand his point. And I hate it. I am selfish, but I don't want to be selfish this time.

Travis loves his mother. And it's heartbreaking that he'll choose me over his mother.

After an hour drive, Terrence dropped me on a hospital. He told me the room number and floor.

"What are you doing here?" Trav asked. He stood up then went to me. He held my arm.

I looked at his mother who's on the ICU. Hindi ko alam na ganito ko pala s'ya unang makikita.

"I-I was looking for you on your company. Nakita ko si Terrence at dinala n'ya ako dito."

Niyakap ko si Travis nang mahigpit. I cried on his chest. "I'm sorry, Travis."

"Hush, Love. You're forgiven," he gently said. "I was just busy with other matters kaya hindi kita napupuntahan."

Kumikirot ang puso ko. Bakit ganito n'ya ako kamahal? I am not deserving for this kind of love. I am selfish and egoistic. Wala akong nagawang maganda para mabigyan ng ganitong labis na pagmamahal.

"If you have to go to New York, I'll go with you, Tia," Travis added then I felt his kiss on my head. "I know that you're doing this for the future. You need this for your career. It's a great opportunity for you, and I'm sorry for trying to stop you from reaching your goals and your dreams."

Stop please. You have to stop being this understanding.

"You're needed here, Trav. Look at your mother." I'm trying my best to be strong. Kahit pa ang gusto ko na lang ay humagulgol dito sa harap n'ya at ipakita kung gaano ko pinagsisisihan ang lahat.

Travis shook his head. "I don't think there's a way to save the company. It's falling. The investors are losing their trust and starting to withdraw from the company before its complete bankruptcy. And Mama... si Troy ang kailangan n'ya. Kaya naman s'ya inatake ay dahil kay Troy."

"Kung aalis ka, Trav, mas lalo lang sasama ang loob ng Mama mo."

Trav gave me a pained smile. "Yeah. Kaya susunod na lang ako sa'yo sa New York. Mauna ka na muna, Love."

I don't know if we're fine. Ni wala naman akong nagawa. Travis forgave me even when I don't think I deserve it.

The schedule of my flight to New York came. Hindi ko na inasahan na ihahatid ako ni Travis. He's busy with his mother and on salvaging their company. I also heard from Lacey that cases were filed against his father for issuing bounced checks. Their remaining properties were also up for bidding to pay for their family's debts.

"Tia, your boyfriend is Travis Amante, right?" Brandon asked. Siya ang katabi ko dito sa business class sa eroplano. Makakasama ko rin s'ya sa bagong branch ng kompanya nila at maging sa papasukang eskwelahan.

From looking out the window, I turned to him. "Yes. Why?"

Brandon shook his head.

"Why?" I asked again.

He sighed then he showed me a document on his iPad.

"Thirty-seven million?!" gulantang na sabi ko nang makita kung gaano kalaki ang utang ng mga Amante sa kanila.

"Tito Leonardo was a gambling freak. Natalo sa casino at umutang kay Dad ng pera hoping na makakabawi s'ya. Ang kaso ay lalo pang natalo."

Sumakit ang ulo ko sa nalaman. Ang lakas ng loob n'ya na insultuhin ako a!

"Trav's not like his father," I said, defending my beloved.

Brandon nodded. "He isn't. But I'm sure it's pain in the ass to solve this dipshit his father brought to their family. Tita Trinity had a heart attack with everything that's happening. I'm sure your boyfriend is taking serious blows from this. Is it alright that you're here, Tia? I think he needs you now more than ever."

I sighed. "I tried talking my way out of this. But I don't have the money to pay for my way out."

"You could have told me!" Brandon hissed. "Ngayon ko lang kasi naalala na boyfriend mo 'yong si Travis Amante. Sorry, Tia."

I shook my head. "I'm a distraction to Travis. He needs to focus on his family for now."

But deep within me, I know that Brandon is right. Travis needs me now on his side. For moral support.

Fuck my impulsive decisions!

_________________

2 July 2019 - 23:45

July 25, 2024 (edited)