Camila Pov Sophie, like any healthy child, grew up, thank God. Yes, because as babies are cute and beautiful when they do not do anything alone, they do a certain job. And even if we repent in the front for having twisted so that they had grown soon, deep down we feel an immense joy to see them mature and become people full of health and ready to conquer the world. But she's not an adult yet, not a teenager. It is far from that. Sophie is 6 years old, there are exactly two days. We have not yet witnessed the fall of her first milk tooth or her first graduation, but we were there when she first rode her bike and encouraged her on her first day of school. We changed many diapers, bought many dolls, heard many cries coming from grated knees. We teach her how to swim and we begin her reading. We were first-time mothers, but according to Clara, we did very well. I agree, although it has no basis for reference. Sophie looks like a pretty serelepe child. His sympathy and his way of appearing to like everyone are his trademark. She rarely gets irritated, and sometimes when she does not know how to react to a particular stimulus, she chooses to burst into laughter. She can make friends with a simple exit, whether going to the park or to the bakery. It is humanly impossible not to love her. For better education, Lauren and I share our obligations as mothers. This means that she is responsible for the "sins", while saying the "no" needed for me. Luckily (because the last thing I want is to become a boring and repressive mother competing with Lauren a funny mother and "way"), Sophie is a good child. An angel, no matter how agitated. We do not need (I do not need) to suppress it twice. She simply understands that if I do not let her do something, there must be some motive, and she magically obeys (which is rather odd.) Children of six should not have this insight. I really have nothing to complain about. Many children are pests, but not her. And she's only 6 years old. There are exactly two days. Which makes today a special day for me. - Emma? I called, coming into the kitchen and finding her on the stove. - Hi, Mila! - She answered all happy - Happy birthday! "Thank you ..." I said, still drowsy, hugging her and throwing myself on top of her. "What time is it?" - Almost 11am. I'm making lunch, they'll be here soon. "" Shit ... I slept a lot.I said, holding my hand to my head. "I should be helping you ..." "No! It's your birthday. And birthdays do not work. Emma likes to give me orders. By this time we already have this level of intimacy. - Hey, I like to cook, and you know how to ... - You - will - will - cook. I snorted. She is as stubborn as a mule, and I knew the only way to get close to the stove would be to hit her with a frying pan and leave her unconscious in a corner. I gave up fighting. - Okay. Where's Sophie? "She was in the treehouse the last time I saw her. A tree house. Lauren gave Sophie a tree house as a six year gift. And it is not one of those tree houses made of wood stumps and ropes: It is a house with door and glass windows, porch, staircase and two floors. A family could easily live there. The "little house" was built on the big pink tree (as we call it) that sits in the corner of the garden. Thanks to Lauren's commitment to finding a company that specializes in such constructions and making it clear she wanted it ready as soon as possible, it was completed in less than three weeks. It was three weeks with huge plates around the work, preventing Sophie from seeing what was going on so that on her birthday she would have a surprise. And she was surprised. And to be honest, so do I. It was a beautiful job indeed, though I had a slight headache just thinking of the dangers my daughter might be going through on that porch, however much the house was only six feet from the ground. And as much as there were cute mattresses beneath her (because Lauren, thank God, is more neurotic than I am). - She is alone? I asked, wondering if Lauren was with her. - He's with Athena. Athena is a Maltese female dog, with eyes that look like two jabuticabas, white like a cream ice cream ball that goes back and forth behind the owner: My daughter. This was Lauren's gift for her 5-year-old, a dog that seems to be battery-powered. She felt compelled to cheer her up after her frog (another gift from Lauren, who could not say no) died. His name was Shawn, and at his wake - carefully organized by Sophie - Clara, Mike, Lauren and I had to give our feelings to their little pit. Shawn remains buried in the garden to this day. But Athena arrived, bringing back all the joy of Sophie. She gives at least two baths in the dog per week with the peach shampoo. It's a compulsion, which makes Athena a happy little walking peach. With a pink bow on her head. "Oh, right ... But did you see Lauren?" - Not. She was not there when I arrived. He must have left early. I got scared. Why did Lauren have to leave early on a Sunday? Had my birthday had anything to do with it, or was its sudden disappearance a coincidence? "Well, all right ... So I see ..." "HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MOTHER! I was nearly flung to the floor by a low (literally) Sophie blow, which clung to my waist like a tick as I turned to leave the kitchen. She has an incredible ability to be silent whenever she wants, and scream like I'm deaf in the next moment. - Aaah, thank you! I replied happily, hugging her back and leaning down. She gave me an effusive kiss. - Come on, Athena! I'm talking to her! Sophie let out a half-squeaky voice, trying to get Athena to stop jumping on my legs like I was a piece of underdog. She wanted to congratulate me as well. - Hi, Athena. I said, amused. - MOTHER, WAIT THERE! And so, out of nowhere, Sophie stumbled out of the kitchen as if she had a stomach ache. Athena ran after her. "Why does she scream so much?" - Let. "I think she's like that when she's very excited about something." Emma tried to explain. "If I get out of here, she's going to have a syncope, will not she?" - Go. She pointed out. I thought it best to wait, taking a peach from the fruit bowl and eating. Athena always makes me want to eat peaches. When Sophie returned, she carried in one hand a bouquet of white Camellias, and in the other a paper.- I have two gifts for you! She said with a smile from ear to ear, handing me the bouquet and then the paper. It was a drawing, which she made a point of explaining - It's us! This is Grandma and this is Grandpa. This is Mom, and here I am with Athena. And this is Emma. And this is you. "Am I too?" Emma came close to see. Clara and Mike were the couple of stick figures in the corner. Emma's toothpick was waving, as if it were a photograph. Lauren's doll had two large green spheres in her eyes. The lower doll next to her also had green eyes. There was a white ball with a pink bow at the height of his chest. Finally, on the other side of her, was a little stick figure that could only be myself. We were all in a garden full of flowers, next to a tall pink tree. I have identified our own garden. "Is it raining and shining at the same time?" Emma asked curiously, noting the yellow, round sun on one side, and on the other a cloud unloading raindrops upon "us." "It's ..." Sophie began, using a teacher's tone in her voice. "It's just that Mom saw me sketching, and she said Mom Camz liked rain. And, well, since it's not raining today, I give rain to her. She punctuated the explanation as if it were something very simple to be understood, smiling in that cute way. And then I started to cry like an imbecile. - I'm sorry mom! I can put out the rain ... - No, sunshine! - I tried to explain, hugging her and giving her a passionate kiss - Mom loved it! "But you're crying!" She said with a pout. "But I'm not sad. I promise. I'm very happy, and I really enjoyed the present! "But I do not like to see you crying ..." "All right. I said, wiping my tears. She seemed to doubt me, so I decided to change the subject. "What about the flowers?" Sophie made a face of landscape. - It's your other gift. - Oh yes? - I provoked her. - IS. "Does mama Lo have anything to do with it?" "No ... Sophie does not know how to lie. Some kids can do that by that age. My daughter is not one of those children. Her eyes widen as if she were being silently electrocuted. - Okay, - I said, trying not to laugh - Thanks, I loved it! I hugged her again, and at that moment Athena began to leap on my legs again. - AI, ATENA! LET ME TALK WITH MOM! She let out a little nervous, and Athena was scared and ran out of the kitchen. Sophie immediately felt herself the worst person in the world, and ran out the door behind the bouncing peach-EI, WAIT! Sorry, Athena! "Wait, Sophie-" "No use. She will not listen to anyone until she apologizes at least ten times to Athena. Emma said quietly, laughing at the situation. I sighed. I found a vase and filled it with water, putting the flowers in it. When I was about to go out to save my drawing somewhere-and look for Lauren-the phone rang. - Hello? - Hi darling! Happy Birthday! I wish you a happy life! - Hi, Clara! Thank you! - We're here to kiss you in person! - Ah yes! Of course! is that I woke up a little late, so maybe lunch will take a little ... "I started to run through the kitchen, picking up some platters hoping to help Emma's work move faster.She smacked a spoon in my hand like I was being rude. "Oh, I can help you ..." "No way! You're not coming to celebrate my birthday to help get things sorted! Where did you first meet? Sophie walked back into the kitchen, skipping Athena in her lap. Apparently the two of them had made up. - Mom! - And what's wrong? You know I like to help ... "" Mom! "Just a little bit, sunshine. "I told my daughter dearly," Clara said, "you do not have to. Emma and I get the message. - "You" an ova! Emma replied. - Mom! Athena started jumping on my legs again. "Sophie, does your dog have springs on his paws?" - Okay, okay. I'll take the dessert then. Clara said patiently. "And do not worry if lunch's late." - Mom! - Okay, Clara, thank you! A kiss! - Mom! I hung up the phone, turning to Sophie then and poking her in the most unbearable way with every word: "Hi." Hi. Hi. Hi. She laughed. - See how annoying it is? I asked, putting the phone in place. "You did not answer me ..." "I was talking to Grandma on the phone. Now you can talk. - That's where Mommy's come. She asked to call you in the garden. - Because? - Your gift is there. I considered his answer for some time. "And why does not she bring it here?" I asked. - Because it does not fit. - She laughed. I froze. "Oh-oh ..." Emma snapped. Fucking whore, Lauren ... - Come on! She said, grabbing my hand and pulling me out. I followed her into the hall, already plotting how to punish Lauren for whatever she had done. Anything large enough not to fit inside that huge kitchen would classify her as "guilty." When we arrived in the garden, I closed my eyes slowly and took a deep breath. Sophie let go of my hand and ran off to the black Mini Cooper parked in front of the garage with the doors open. A car. Why had not I thought of that? It was Lauren's face. - Is not cool? She shouted to me, a few feet away, getting into the car and sitting in the driver's seat. "May I drive?" - Not. I said, rubbing my forehead and walking over to her. - Because? She asked disappointed. "Because you need a driver's license to drive." - Because? "Because if you drive without a driver's license you're stuck." - Because? - Because yes. - Aaah ... - Where's mama Lo? I asked, wanting to murder her. - Do not know. She was here. It must be hidden. - I'm going to find her. Do not let Athena get in the car, okay? - OK. She replied, sitting down on the seat, holding the steering wheel and making a half-psychotic expression. Just in case, I took the ignition key and took it with me. - Lauren! I called in my pissed-off voice, entering each room of that house and turning to look for the next one when I realized she was not there. I went into the library, into the living room, and into the pool. Emma assured me that she had not been through the kitchen. I went upstairs and shouted by her name until we got to our room. I entered the bathroom and concluded that it was not there. As I turned to leave and continue my search, I found her an inch from me, like a psychopath. I stumbled back a few steps backward into the marble sink.- Hi love. Happy Birthday! She said quietly, with a manic smile on her face. If I did not know her, I could swear that Lauren would stab me in that second and watch my death slowly on the tile floor. "Did you like the present?" "Do you remember my exact words last night?" I asked, ignoring the fact that I was almost squeezed against the wall. - I do remember. "And what were they?" "You said you did not want any birthday memories." - Precisely. - So? She asked, looking amused. "You have," you agreed. "Yes." I nodded. I lifted the car keys to his eyes and shook them. "What the fuck is this?" She pretended a face of astonishment, as if she had been verbally assaulted. "So you call a" souvenir "car? I'm chocked. I controlled myself so as not to squeeze it. "Lauren-" "It's much more than a memory." It is very useful. - I dont know how to drive. I spoke slowly, articulating the words very well so that she understood them. "It's high time we learned." I wished I had a hammer of flesh on my hands so I could knead his fingers, one by one. "Come on," she continued. "I've never given you anything of that level. "You wanted to give me a house in French Polynesia last year!" "And you did not!" "But of course I did not!" My voice began to shriek. "If I were to let you fill me with gifts, in three years I would have enough money to buy the Taj Mahal and live in it! "But you're really exaggerated." I gave you a car. Big things. I took a deep breath and counted to three. I tried to convince myself that I was overreacting. Why, it was just a car. - Okay, Lauren. - I was silent for a while - I go into a high school ... - I can get the driver's license if you want. Self-study classes are always so annoying ... I stared at her wondering if she ever heard what I was saying. Was she paying attention? "Do that and I'll take your balls out, fried, and I'll give Athena food." She made a funny face of pain. "You'd lose if you did that ..." She came even closer. By now I was practically sitting on top of the sink. "Are not you going to thank for the gift?" She asked, approaching our faces. - By the car? I arched my eyebrows. But thank you for the flowers. - I have nothing to do with it. It was Sophie's thing. - Of course it was. She laughed in a sweet way. In the background Lauren always knew that those details, those little acts and memories meant a lot more to me. She knows me. You know that a simple Camelia, torn from the garden of Clara by any means with earth and everything, or a spring night as she lies on the grass beside me in our own garden, is worth much more than any jewel or gift. They are worth more because they symbolize much more. Because they bring me back memories, and because they show me that romanticism is still here, alive between us. Not only do I live but, it seems, more intense. If Sophie's birth had momentarily removed us (which was normal, since that was exactly the case with almost any couple), her growth gave us the chance and the time to get closer again.Maybe it was just an impression, but it seems that Lauren developed some kind of weird worship for me. Not that it scares me or makes me feel uncomfortable - not EVEN - but it's curious and a little strange how sometimes I feel on some kind of pedestal. "I think it's time we had a second honeymoon." She spoke very softly, kissing me gently. I put my arm around his neck. "And you think your daughter will not want to come along?" I asked, completely forgetting to continue bitching with her. - We left her with Enzo in France and we sent her. She opened her eyes as if she'd just said something very clever - Damn, I'm a genius! He smiled, kissing her intensely without warning. For a long time. "I'll buy the tickets tomorrow." She spoke against my mouth, wrapping her arms around my waist and pulling me against her. "Is Australia good for you?" - Hey, hurry up. We got to see a lot of things. - What things? I take a vacation, you come with me. I did not go back to work after Sophie was born. I accepted to play my own role "Clara", which, in the end, was more or less easy. My life was basically focused on the simple goal of taking care of my family and making everyone well. It may not be an example of autonomy and independence and all those things that many women today have as their goal of life, but I'm happy. Happy, from the bottom of my heart. And that's enough to make me understand that I do not need to change. Which means I can actually go anywhere with her. "You're always so practical ..." "You should be that way, too." One of his hands suddenly entered my hair and pulled my face hard against hers. His tongue simply invaded my mouth as if it did not have to be announced. Just as my legs would curl around her waist of their own accord, I heard a familiar little voice approaching. - Maaaaaaama ... - Hmmmfff ... Why does it always mess up our joke? She finished without separating our mouths. - Because she's our daughter. It's her role. - Smile. - Maaaaaaaama ... - OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOI! She responded with a trace of almost impaired impatience in her voice. Before Sophie entered the bathroom all of a sudden-because sometimes it just popped in like a haunt-I came down from the sink and pulled away from Lauren. - Mama. She said, walking in an imposing bathroom inside. Simple as that, as if it were not being fuck-fuck anyone. - May I help? She answered, turning on the tap and pretending to wash her hands. - I'm back here. "But my ears will hear you from anywhere, Princess. She replied, not being able to turn around at all. Sophie would probably ask what was big in her pants, and then we'd have to start talking about sexuality a little too early with her. - It's Athena. - She said. - What about Athena? "She pooped me in the seat of Mom's car. Lauren grimaced and squirmed still on her back, hopping and pulling her pants forward. "Did not Mom tell you not to let Athena come in, love?" Sophie stared at her mother as if she were a disgusting worm, obviously doubting her intellectual ability. She shook her hand, probably thinking she was saying something too obvious and could be followed by an "alo-or?": "But I did not." She disobeyed me. I laughed. It was this kind of attitude that made her become more and more a perfect miniature of Lauren. His look of disdain is a copy of hers. Other than that, every little detail in her appearance comes back to her. The shape of the eyes, the nose, the mouth, the shape of the face, the ears, the hands ... Everything, absolutely everything is the same as Lauren. Well, not everything. The hair is not. - Damn it, Athena! Athena, who was on Sophie's side, bent her head wondering what Lauren wanted with her. - Mama! She spoke with her eyes bulging in shock, putting her hands to her mouth. "You swear!" - Yeah, I know. She said, running her hands through her hair and messing them up more. "Do not imitate the breast."She is rude, and educated girls do not do that. And you're very polite. - I am. She pointed out, clearly proud of herself. - Right. Lauren sighed, taking the keys from my hand. "I'll clean your present." "And I'm going to take a shower and get ready." - Ri - Your parents are here soon. "Did you hear that, Athena?" Sophie spoke in a slightly shrill voice. "Soon the guests are here and we're not ready!" "Of course they are. - Lauren got in. - You look beautiful. - Mama, I got pajamas on. - And what's wrong? "Matteo can not see me in his pajamas. Matteo is Sophie's best friend. They met in high school, and have not seen each other ever since. Matteo is of Italian origin, but his eyes are a little drawn and a charming smile. Whenever I see them together they are fighting, but one does not live without the other. Most of the time Sophie finds him silly: "He's a boy. Boys are fools." But deep down, I think she likes it when it implies. - "Matteo" who? Lauren asked. - It's her little friend. - I explained - He was traveling and could not come to congratulate her on the right day, but arrived today. I thought I'd better ask you to come see Sophie. Lauren looked at me suspiciously. "Where do you two meet?" - From school. - What's he like? - Stew. - How old is he? - Six. Lauren stared at me with a concerned expression. "I'll pay attention to this kid. "Do not be ridiculous. I told her. "I'm not. Men are some - and stopped sounding, just gesturing with his mouth - "motherfuckers." - He's six years old. Six! - He's going to grow up. I sighed. Sophie looked at us both as if she understood nothing. "He's cute, Lauren. I spoke firmly, wanting to put an end to that conversation. "My intuition says you're going to get on very well. - Right. She answered completely skeptically, as if I were drunk. "Mom, can I wear your lipstick?" "No, you can not. - Lauren said, trying not to be dry with the daughter - You already are beautiful. Now let's clean up what Athena did in Mama's gift. Sophie sighed without understanding, and when Lauren left she went behind. But before I let her go, I took her by the hand and pulled her close to my mouth, speaking very softly to her ear. "I've already left a little light in your drawer." Just do not let mama know. *** My birthday parties were never held in nightclubs or clubs or party houses. My birthday parties were always with my family, and as much as Lauren found it a bit depressing, I disagreed. Maybe, if it was on my skin, having gone through the losses that I went through, she could understand why that was my private fun. It did not mean giving people more or less value: It was simply seeing things differently. This birthday was no different. A family gathering in the living room of my house was enough to make me happy. Mike spent a lot of time talking things over with Lauren. Clara learned at least three different jokes with Sophie, who only left her grandmother when Matteo arrived with her parents. The boy's presence also caught the attention of Lauren who, in an incredibly "mature" attitude, decided to wear that menacing shirt Oliver gave her about five years ago. Of course she knows that, first, Matteo does not understand French, and that second, even if he understood, he would not give a damn. But I have to admit that your stupid jealousy amused me. It was priceless the face that Lauren did knowing that the daughter and the little friend were playing in the tree house, with Athena as sole company. She spent the whole party going there to offer Brigadier to both of them, obviously in order to make sure Matteo was not bothering Sophie. The boy's parents, thank God, did not notice how strange my wife is.After the cake, a few cups of soda dropped and a knee grated once more on the ground (because "Pickle is fun, Mom!"), The day is over. I received the wishes of everyone I love, and that was enough to make me happy. It's 10pm. Sophie's been out of bed for some time, and it looks like she'll just wake up tomorrow. Lauren is in there arranging things by herself, since Emma is gone. And I'm here in the garden. The sky is very dark, which makes the stars are shining more than normal. It's a good setting for my haunted garden. It makes him look even better, gives me a good atmosphere to think about. Sometimes I just think. I think of everything that has happened in recent years. I think of how a life can change from water to wine, almost like magic. I think everything I went through before it came into my life, however painful it may have been, is now only a memory. Does not matter. I want to keep my past, but not to remember the pain that is gone. I want to keep from him the fact that one day I underestimated the power of fairy tales and broke my face. And that it was my enchanted princess who was responsible for teaching me this. My secret is kept. It will go on like this for a long time, maybe forever. One day, who knows, I feel ready to tell. But it is still unconfessable. For now it is. For the moment only she knows, and I honestly think only she should know. Maybe for now. Maybe forever. But I am fine. Definitely well. I'm thinking about today, about my family and about her. I've been thinking about her a lot. I'm thinking about how long it will take until she notices I'm not in there and picks me up here in the garden. And when she does, I'm thinking how to give Lauren the news that she's going to be a mother again. This time, twins.