Misunderstandings | Namgi

Chapter 4

Yoongi POV

"How're you feeling, Yoongi? Do you feel a bit better with yourself now that you've had a day in your softer style?" Hobi asks lightly as he carries a tray of three bowls for us all to have dinner together in the living room. I shrug lightly as I take two of the bowls off the tray, one for myself and the other for Tae as I hand it to him.

"I dunno. It's a little harder to hate me when I've got blue hair like this in all honesty. It just makes me wanna giggle when I see it." I answer quietly with a small shrug, grabbing my chopsticks off the tray before beginning to eat. They both smile over at me, Tae reaching out to smooth my hair gently.

"Because it reminds you of cotton candy?" Tae questions with a knowing smile. I giggle as I look over at him with a small smile, knowing he's thinking the same thing as I am, nodding.

"Oh come on now. You two can't keep this little sugary secret from me." Hobi whines with a smile of his own. I sigh contently at this as I lay my head on his shoulder, taking another bite of food.

"There was this little fair that would come around for just a couple days during the summer, and it always sold cotton candy. You could get blue or pink, like always. Tae would always demand that I go with him to get my away from my family, and we'd joke about the candy. We'd always get blue because 'it's a manly color' and we'd mess around with it, making each other little mustaches and beards, claiming that it's what we'd look like when we became old and gray." I giggle softly as I look over to Tae who's grinning.

"And that's what this shade of blue reminds you of?" Hobi chuckles gently as he glances down at me curiously. I shrug a bit.

"Kinda. I just think it's a soft shade of blue, though it's nowhere near the color of the cotton candy. It being blue and not being a dark shade makes me think of the candy. It being a soft shade a blue... It's soft, and you don't wanna hurt soft things. It also reminds me of water a little bit, and you can't hurt water no matter how much you try. So what's the point in trying, if you know you won't do any damage anyways?" I explain, hoping they'll both understand my want and like for the color they both so kindly let me dye it.

"Oh, Yoongi. Those are great reasons to choose that kind of color. I'm so proud of you for wanting to do that for yourself, you know? It's taking little steps like that to try and remind yourself to be nicer to yourself that's important. To remind yourself that it's okay to be nicer to yourself." Hobi murmurs softly, kissing the top of my head once more.

I pick my head up off his shoulder, giving him a small smile before taking another bite of food.

"It doesn't make it hurt any less. Doesn't make all of the memories go away. It doesn't make the want to hurt ease up at all. It makes it more bearable to look in the mirror though. Makes it a little easier to stand myself." I whisper quietly before taking another bite.

"That's okay, Yoongi. It's a process, hyung. You did this for you, to remind yourself that you're soft and need handled with a little more care than what you're wanting to do. And that's extremely important, hyung. You're doing so good, Yoongi, even if you don't see it yet." Tae comforts with a small supportive smile before wrapping an arm around my shoulders. I sigh softly at this, taking a deep breath and nodding.

"I just... I just wish things hadn't turned out this way." I choke out, eyes falling shut as I let my head stay ducked a bit. I soon feel the bowl getting removed from my lap before I'm embraced by the both of them, being engulfed in the warmth of hugs from both boys. I try my hardest not to cry, but fail miserably, choking back sob after sob as they both hold me tightly.

"Shhhh. It's gonna be okay, hyung. It's gonna be okay. I promise, we'll get you through this. We're gonna be right with you every step of the way. You gotta let him go, Yoongi. He doesn't deserve you after what he did. It's gonna be okay, alright? We're here for you." Hoseok coos gently, though I can hear it in his voice that he's fighting off his own tears.