A Soldier's Heart

Freedom (Beth)

I wanted to tell Travis right off what had happened, but first I wanted to fix myself up a bit. I had a shower and washed my hair, twisted it into a French coil and then put on my prettiest dress. I sure looked better than I had earlier.

I practically ran to Travis' house. I knocked on the door and while I waited for someone to answer it, I pinched my cheeks a bit to get some colour into them.

Mrs. Barrett was surprised to see me. I never came on a Sunday. But she invited me into the kitchen and called Travis. He had a worried look on his face when he first saw me, but my smile must have told him nothing was wrong.

I told Travis what my pa had said."Wow!" was all he said at first.

"So if I'm going to have some freedom, I guess that means I can go on dates now." I hoped he would get the hint. The other girls at school had dates since they were fourteen.

"I guess it does." Travis smiled, but he didn't take the hint. And it didn't look like he noticed I fixed myself up for him.

Travis' pa must have came in while I was explaining. He was standing behind me but I didn't know it until he cleared his throat.

"It's good that you're going to have more freedom, Beth," he said, coming around and sitting at the table with us. "But there's a responsibility that goes with it. You should always let your father know where you are and what you are doing. You took a terrible chance this weekend."

So. Travis must have told them what happened. I hoped they didn't think Travis and me were doing it.

"I know. I will, from now on."

"And take advantage of this chance God has given you, to build a relationship with your father."

I didn't know about that. I wasn't sure I wanted a relationship with him.

But slowly things did start to get better between us. Pa started giving me a little money to spend on myself, and I bought some lipstick and mascara and some cologne that smelled like flowers. I shortened my skirts a little, and Pa didn't say anything.

I tried to repay him by cooking his favorite meals and trying harder to keep the house clean. One day when I was washing the dishes and Pa was watching television, I realized that he hadn't been drinking so much lately. And neither was Jake, after Pa told him he was old enough to buy his own liquor.

In most ways I was happier than I had ever been. I don't know whether it was the shorter skirts, or the makeup, or just that I was smiling more, but boys started getting interested in me.

The first time a boy asked me out, I told him I had to ask my pa. To my surprise, Pa said I could go if he met the boy first. When Bill came to pick me up, Pa told him he'd better have me home by eleven and he'd better not do any hanky-panky. Bill looked as nervous as I felt, standing there in our living room with Pa. We went to a movie and got a hamburger after, but there was no hanky-panky. Bill didn't ask me out again, but that didn't bother me.

There was only one person I really wanted to ask me out, and he didn't.