A Soldier's Heart

Travis's Solution (Anne)

By the time Travis was nine, he had already started shooting up and was as tall as I. He took it into his head that he wanted to learn self-defense. I suspect Beth had something to do with that. She frequently bore bruises that she would say were from running into furniture or falling, and Travis was always skeptical of her explanations.

He saved up his allowance for months, and I caught him counting his savings with an unhappy look on his face.

"It's not enough," he said with a sigh.

"Enough for what?"

"Enough to take judo or kung-fu lessons."

I shuddered. Violence never solves anything. I told him we should discuss it as a family.

We went down to Dave's study, where he was working on next Sunday's sermon. Travis knocked on the door. Dave opened it.

"Can I talk to you, Dad?"

"Of course, son. Come in." Dave raised an eyebrow at me, as we both came in and sat down in the chairs where Dave frequently counseled his parishioners. I left it to Travis to explain.

"Dad, I want to take judo or kung-fu lessons. But I don't have enough money. I was hoping you could give me the money and take it out of the allowance I'm going to get later."

"Why do you want to take judo lessons?"

"So I can defend myself, or someone else if they need it."

Dave looked at me, and I could tell his thoughts were on the same track as mine.

"Son, you know violence isn't the answer to trouble, and often makes it worse."

"But shouldn't we stop other people if they're being violent and hurt someone else?"

"We should stop them if we can, but preferably without violence."

"What if that's the only way to stop them?"

Dave sighed. "Wiser men than I have struggled with that question for thousands of years. I can only tell you what I believe, what our Lord taught us: turn the other cheek."

Travis jumped to his feet, his face red, his eyes blazing.

"If Mom or I were being hurt, wouldn't you do something to stop it?"

Dave winced. His expression said he didn't want to say what was about to come out, but we had promised honesty in raising our family. He put his hands on Travis shoulders.

"Son, I would defend you or your Mom to the last bit of my ability. But in doing that, I would be betraying my deepest beliefs. My love for you would make me betray them. I am weak, like any man."

"But even Jesus got mad! Remember how he turned the money-changers' tables upside down?"

"Indeed He did. But He did not attack the money-changers."

Father and son regarded each other for a few moments, neither willing to back down. Finally Dave spoke.

"Travis, you have a good heart and that is one of your greatest strengths. And you know what is right and what is wrong. Deep in your heart, you know. So I am not going to forbid you to take judo lessons. But I am not going to encourage you, either. If you really want to do it, you must do it yourself, either by saving up your allowance or earning the money somehow. When you have enough money, you must look into your heart and do what it tells you to do."

Travis nodded gravely and got up. There was a firm resolve on his face. I could see the man he would become.