lucy, i'm drunk

XVII

- friends -
[ chris' pov ]

"fuck. fuck." i say panting as i put on my shoes and grabbed my car keys. my blood started to boil and i was ready to fuck somebody up. my fist kept on clenching and i could feel my anger problems come.

"bruh, you okay?" cj looks at me putting his hand on my shoulder.

i hate when someone asks me am i okay. bro, do i look fucking okay? fucking idiots.

i hissed "leave me the fuck alone." i roughly remove his hand from my shoulder.

"bruh, i'm just tryna help for fucks sake. who peed on your cereals." he says rolling his eyes like a little bitch.

i looked at him so fucking pissed. i was ready to punch him. "bruh, i'm not in the mood." i stood up "when i tell you to leave me alone." i pushed him "you leave me the fuck alone. understood?"

cj then backed away and raised his hand "yo, i'm sorry."

josie. bruh this fucking bitch. i'll never understand girls that listen to their fucking friends without even talking to their significant other. listen to me first for fucks sake because it's my situation and nobody elses.

it was my time to start over. she truly made me happy. she made me genuinely, truly, happy but she found out how i used to be. used to be. past sentence. yeah its only been a month but jesus christ, i was ready to change right when i was with her.

she was supposed to be my breath of fresh air but josie told her my side that i didn't want her to know about me. that isn't me. when i fuck other girls, it doesn't mean shit. one night stands make me calm and not overthink. thats all.

i entered the car and called josie. "you dumbass bitch where are you?"

"look you fucking moron, lucy is with me and i can't believe you didn't tell her this." she sighs through the phone. i can already imagine her rolling her eyes.

"i was planning to tell her and you fucking ruined that shit. this is MY fucking relationship, who are YOU to tell her these type of shit. your words needed to come out of MY fucking mouth you fucking cunt."

"chris, you don't deserve her. " she hangs up the phone. she then calls me again and i picked up "yeah, and fuck you."

i could feel my anger issues coming so i quickly looked around my car to check if theres any pills to calm myself down because if i wont calm down ill lose control like i usually do. i'd usually never take pills for my anger but right now i just want to think clearly because this is about lucy. i don't want to scare her off when she sees me mad.

so many shit happens when im mad. when i was staying at my parents house i broke the wooden floor. i was so mad i started punching the floor and i was screaming for what felt like an eternity. while i was punching the floor, i was so mad that i didn't even notice my fist were bleeding so much. i noticed i was bleeding when i felt my bone break. it hurt but nothing hurt as the pain i was feeling that moment. that situation wasn't nothing. i almost killed a kid at the age of thirteen.

i was never the type to dress like a pretty boy in school. i've always kept it simple and i never wanted to be the center of attention. till this day, i'm the same. these nineteen years of my life i'm either wearing everything black or a hoodie. i wear something that covers my whole body and face. when i was twelve i always wore a hoodie and sweatpants to cover the bruises from my dad. i also didn't like removing my hood until one day, a fucking stupid bitch removed my hood. i got heated because that day i had a big ass bruise on my neck and i didn't want anyone seeing that shit. i got so fucking mad that pushed him on the floor and i started beating him up to the point where he couldn't breathe anymore.