Rebel Just for Kicks (Billy Hargrove x Reader)

Chapter 10

*Disclaimer* This chapter describes an experience with ecstasy. I do not condone this behavior and don't encourage anyone to do drugs of any kind.

The night progressed kind of like the previous night, lot's of drinking, smoking and laughing. We were lucky there weren't any neighbours close by other wise they probably called the cops for a noise complaint. Even though you, Polly and Billy were already 18, the rest was still very much underage, which obviously didn't make the drinking legal, but it was a little easier to explain if cops would show up. But, you didn't have to worry about that.
Mike, Kat, Polly and Lewis already gone to bed so the 4 of you still sat outside around a slowly dying fire.

Steve comes back from inside with a big bag of marshmallows and throws them your way. You look at the bag. All kind of memories flash through your mind, from when you were a kid and even when you went camping with Steve, there were always marshmallows.
Soon all four of you are holding one above the fire, well Steve is holding two at the same time. Billy looks uncomfortable as if he doesn't really know what he's doing. Tommy is just staring at the fire, tapping his foot to the rhythm of the music.
'Isn't it time for spooky stories?' You say jokingly, making spooky hand gestures. The guys chuckle. You touch your marshmallow to see if it's ready and it sticks to your fingers.
'I thought you were a stranger when I saw you standing there last night.' You say to Billy, blowing on your marshmallow to cool it down.
He chuckles. 'Oh, really?'
'Last night?' Steve says, jealousy mangling with his words. You look up and remember that Steve was here as well.
'I couldn't sleep.' You try and explain but Steve probably already believes what he wants to believe. Why am I even bothering?

You put the whole marshmallow in your mouth, as a strange way of coping with the sudden awkwardness. Billy looks at you with your mouth full and chuckles, shaking his head.
Steve notices the little glances you've been having for the whole trip.
He throws his marshmallows in the fire. 'I'm going to bed.' and storms off.
'I swear to god, he's such a drama queen.' You say, finally having swallowed the marshmallow.
'He's just hurt, Y/N.' Tommy says defending him.
You sigh, grabbing a cigarette out of your pack. 'I know.' You put one in your mouth and light it. Billy and Tommy follow your lead.
'He told me that, he said he loved you a little before the fight.' Tommy continues.
You take a long drag from your cigarette and nod.
'And you didn't say it back?' He asks as if he didn't know the answer already.
'Nope.' You say unbothered. You stand up, not wanting to talk about it anymore, it was like beating a dead horse. 'I'm gonna hit the sack.' You say as you make your way over to the sliding door, more tired than ever.

The days are starting to look a lot alike since all you did was drink and swim. But it was pleasant not worrying about school for once. Senior year was probably one of the busiest years, with everyone applying to colleges and trying to get their GPA up. You've never been bothered with your grades, you weren't a great student and teachers very much disliked you. But hey, who cares right?
You were drifting on a pool floatie, almost falling asleep and soaking up the sun, when you get turned over and fall into the water. You are startled and come up for air as soon as possible. Wiping the hair off your face you see Tommy and Billy and laughing.
'You fucking assholes.' You say as you hang on onto your floatie.
'You looked a little too comfortable.' Tommy says. You splash some water in his face but he looks unbothered by it. The boys start hanging on the floatie too and you start to talk.
'You know, I bought some candies from Frank last week.' Tommy starts. Your interest is peaked.
'Hmm, what kind of candies?' Billy asks with a grin on his face.
'Oh you know, just some ecstasy, nothing special.' Tommy smiles.
'Have you ever done it?' Tommy asks you. You've only smoked weed before but your interest in drugs was very high. Everything that made you forget about your life sounded good.
'No.' You admit, but you have a smile on your face, exited to try it.
'Well I got enough for everybody but, I don't know if Kat's down?' He asks me.
'I don't think so but I'll ask.' You say.
'Tonight?' Billy asks.
'Tonight.' Tommy confirms.

You all stopped drinking right after everyone agreed to take the pills tonight. Kat wasn't joining but she could be the sober chaperone. You are all sitting in the living room.
'Just take half of it, and then after 30 minutes, take the other half if you don't feel it enough.' Tommy is explaining to you. You nod and break one of them in half, giving the other half to Polly, who only done it once before but she said she didn't feel the full effect.
'Cheers.' You say as you and Polly bump the two halves against each other. You take it with plenty of water.
'Now it's time to wait.' Mike says as he walks over to the stereo and puts on some music.
You and Steve are the only people new to ecstasy, so you don't know what to expect.
You start asking them about their previous experience and start to feel a lot more confident, since they were all positive.
Half an hour has pat and you start to feel a little nauseous, but they assure you that this is normal. Suddenly your vision starts to clear up, like everything was blurry before, but now perfectly clear. Everything gets a golden glow and you start to feel warm inside.
'What the fuck?' You accidentally say out loud, unknowing how to process this feeling.
You look at Polly sitting next to you, her hair now a warm purple and her eyes a bright green color.
'You look like you're feeling it.' She says looking at your expression. You nod happily and keep inspecting the room, intrigued by the sudden change of hue.
'Is it overwhelming?' Tommy asks as he comes to check on you.
'No, it's really nice.' You answer. He grabs a whole pill out of the little bag and hands it to you. 'Here, a whole one would be better.' The pill is purple with a crown on it.
After a while you feel a new kind of energy frothing up inside of you, coursing through your body like bubbles. You suddenly feel aware of a pressing sensation in your bladder, so you decided to go to the nearest bathroom. When you're washing your hands you take a look at the mirror. Your tired eyes now looked bright and clear, your pupils seriously dilated.

As you walk back into the living room you see everybody busy in conversation, only Kat, a little left out on the side. Mike has taken your seat to sit next to Polly. Suddenly you notice the music sounds so much better, feeling every beat and hearing every note so clearly. You can't stop yourself from swaying a bit to the music. You start smiling from ear to ear, a happiness you've never felt before taking control of your body. The room temperature starts to rise and you feel your cheeks glowing, your mouth feels dry. You walk up to the kitchen to get some Gatorade. You start to gulp the whole thing down as you see Billy enter the kitchen.
'Hello.' You enthusiastically shout a little. He looked better than he ever did before. His skin was glowing and his hair golden.
'You sure look happy.' Billy answers with a little smile.
'Oh.' You say putting your hand on his chest, desperately wanting to have physical contact.
'I've never felt this good.' You turn around to sit on the counter top, starting to swing your feet. God, it was like the tension in your body was never there. All those mental blocks were gone and you really felt like talking. Billy found his way to a drink as well.
'Why are you so nice to me now?' The words spilling before you knew it. Knowing Billy's defenses were down, you feel like it's the right time to ask some question. But are also a little scared of what you will say.
'I don't really know.' He begins. 'I thought you hated me at first.' He continues as he throws away the empty bottle, and leans on the counter in front of you.
'I just thought you were a douche bag.' You take a little pause to read his face, but he doesn't give anything away. You look him in his eyes. 'You are a mysterious guy with a lot of secrets, that I'm not sure the world will every hear but, you're not a douche.' He raises his eyebrows. 'Okay maybe a little bit.' You correct yourself.
He laughs. 'Look at you, being a people reader.' He looks at you from under his long eyelashes.
The pills have an obvious work on him. He can't stop smiling and a certain twinkle in his eyes had appeared.

'You know when you asked about my mom before?' You ask, you don't know why you started about it but it's like you needed to. Billy nods.
'She passed away 5 years ago.' You say.
Billy's eyes fill with empathy, a very rare sight. 'I'm sorry, Y/N.'
'It's okay.' You say giving him a sad smile. The memories of your mother were sweet and filled with happiness, but people only asked about what happened, making the wound bleed again. So you avoid talking about her.
'I don't even know if my mom is still alive.' He says, putting a new cigarette in his mouth, it has become some sort of coping mechanism for him. It was the same for you.
'What happened?' You ask, genuinely glad he's opening up.
'She left. When I was about 9 or 10.' He takes a long drag. 'My dad wasn't good for her.'
'I think he's not good for you either.' You answer. He lifts his head up quickly and looks you, you see a flash of anger for a second, before it quick fades away. He sighs deeply.
'I'm worried, Billy.' You say with a serious tone. 'About Max too.' You add.
'He doesn't hurt her.' Billy says with a little crack in his voice.
You slide off the counter top and put your hand on his shoulder.
'If you ever want to be distracted, my door is always open.' You say, giving him a little squeeze.
He pulls you in for a unexpected hug. His hands on your back felt so intense. Your senses were heightened, it's like you're being touched for the very first time. You pull away and feel that you started to blush. You don't understand why you're starting to feel a certain way about Billy, but you have a soft spot for him.
'I know it's the drugs, but thank you for telling me.' He says.
'You too.' You say.