Weird shit I say or hear at school

SUMMER EDITION

So a little while ago, on a Saturday night around 8 pm my friend Raf decided it would be a good idea to invite all of our friend group to his house, since his parents we're out of town.

So just for a head count there was Raf, Chase (my cousin who'd been visiting for the week), Owen, Brianna, Violet and myself of course.

Let's just say there was a bit of alcohol involved.
And so after a little while of us just joking and doing dumb shit at his house we
all went out to chili's.
(Not to worry we have our designated driver Owen, he doesn't drink. Who we all love so much for taking us every where and letting us get drunk even though he doesn't.)

So we got into chili's at around ten, completely wasted and rowdy.

We ordered one single plate of nachos and that's it. Then my friend Brianna pointed out the baby back ribs sign on the wall.

Which was a completely horrible idea due to the fact that five drunk people and one sober were all just incredibly huge the office fans.

And so imagine. Six loud and stupid teens singing together while banging their fists onto the table to the beat of the legendary chili's baby back ribs theme.

Surely the staff would be annoyed with us so when they asked us to leave we left singing,

I want my baby back, baby back, baby back,
I want my baby back, baby back, baby back.

And then my friend Raf singing in a high yet horrible falsetto voice,

Chili's baaaby back ribs!

And as we left the manager made sure to see that we all managed to get to the car.

And I'm so thankful that he didn't call the cops for underage drinking.

But as we all piled into owen's poor Toyota 4runner, the last person left to get in, Chase managed to misplace his footing on the sidesteps and slipped off onto the ground.

Every one in the car howled with laughter and tears were flowing.

"Im alright!" He shouted as the Chili's manager began to help him up.
"Hey! I got it! Im an american." He slurred pushed the manager away and climbed into the car.

After we were all safely buckled into our seats, Chase and Owen sitting up front and the rest of us in the back with Violet sitting in my lap.
She referenced supernatural's Jared Padaleki,
"Is that a pencil in your center pocket?" She joked.

We drove off deciding to call it a night.
Owen dropped off the other two girls and as we made our way to Raf's he groaned.
"You guys." Raf said.
"Hmm?" Owen and I answered since Chase had fallen asleep but he was going in and out of consciousness.
"I have to throw up." He mumbled barely audible.

But Owen heard.

"RAFAEL I SWEAR DO NOT." Owen shouted, turning to look into the back seat.
Also waking Chase up.
"If you throw up in my car-I'm going to kill you!" He warned, aggressively turning the car.

"Oh-fuck..I'm gonna throw up." Raf gagged.
"RAF NO." Owen yelled.

We couldn't pull over because we had been driving on one of the most used streets in our town so it was hard to find somewhere to pull over.

Raf then proceeded to unlock the door, and opened it, laying across the seat, sticking his head out the car he let it all out.

Chase and I wheezed while also groaning at how gross that was.

Note that this is all in a car moving 50 miles per hour. With other people on the road especially behind us.

Which I feel so bad for, we're sorry.

"Did he just throw up?" Owen asked me.
And I just laughed in response.

Raf then sat back up and shut the door. Breathing heavily and wiping his mouth.

"I need water." Raf said before going unconscious.

We ended having to sneak him into his house, Chase and Owen held him up as I unlocked the door. The three of us, Owen, Chase and I carried him up the stairs and tossed him on his bed.

Lastly Owen dropped Chase and I off at my house and as we crawled into my window, a patio chair to help us reach the window Chase fell again.

Snickering I drunkenly (for an unknown reason to this day) tossed a toy peanut at him.

To which he picked up confused at first before bringing it close to his face and asking it, and I quote,

"Where's your penis, peanut man?"

It was a great night.