My Darkest Desire (girlxgirl)

Chapter Seven

Cricket didn't associate with Carolina or her family much that night. She got her way out of dinner by saying she felt like she was getting sick, and went to her room to think.

Laying on her bed staring up at the ceiling, it was easy to let her mind run through things on its own. She seemed to replay every moment between her and Carolina in her mind, picking through the memories as if she could find something that might help her figure things out.

At one point around eight, Carolina knocked on the door and asked if she was okay, but Cricket feigned sleep and didn't answer. She waited until she heard footsteps walking away from her room before she sat up again.

Wasn't this exactly what Carolina had done to her? Avoided her because of something she didn't want to tell the other?

Cricket couldn't do this to her. She didn't want Carolina to feel the same way she felt those couple days, just waiting for her best friend to acknowledge her again. But what could you say to someone whom you didn't quite know how you felt about anymore?

Maybe this is what Carolina was struggling with, a little voice in the back of Cricket's mind said, and the more she thought about it, the more she confirmed that it was likely the reason for her blonde friend's 'anger.'

She tried to picture them as a couple. It was easy, really, because they already acted like one. But in her mind's portrayal of the idea, they held hands and kissed a lot more. And suddenly, Cricket was wondering just what it would feel like to have Carolina's lips on her own.

She snapped herself out of the thought just as immediately as it had begun, shaking her head as if to reinforce it.

Stop that. You don't even know if she feels the same way yet.

Are you even sure just how YOU feel about her?

Groaning to herself, she rolled over and buried her face in her pillow, willing her mind to shut up now.

No, she didn't know exactly how she felt about her best friend. But it was obvious that trying to think about it wasn't going to help matters any more. There was only one solution.

She needed to talk things out with the blonde.

Sure, she was nervous, and she was worried about what could happen if maybe, just maybe Carolina didn't feel for her like she'd thought. That thought alone made her want to keep to herself, but she couldn't. She just couldn't.

Tomorrow, she decided just as she felt herself drifting into unconsciousness.

Tomorrow, I'll talk to her.