To Cameron, his home life was unsatisfactory.
But then again, isn't everyone else's? To a certain degree yes, but Cameron's was a bit more than what you would classify as just normal unsatisfactory.
Cameron's father had been a topic that was highly avoided in the Dallas household. Mention of it and his mother would loose her shit. Cameron found this hard. He wanted to talk to his father, see his father but more than anything, he wanted to live with his father.
Unfortunately, there was never really any custody battle or anything. Mr Dallas just took off one day. Finding himself a brand spanking new 21 year old show dancer from Vegas and started a new family. Started a new family, without him.
Cameron couldn't help but hate and admire him at the same time. He had gotten out of this crap hole. He had escaped this godforsaken town. Something Cameron had always dreamt about doing. Cameron however, hated the fact that he was left behind with his psychotic religious driven mother.
Cameron was a religious person himself, to a certain degree though. He believed in Christianity and found their view on things... right. However, there were a lot of aspects about the religion that he didn't like. He knew that certainly not all churches have such a burning hatred for homosexuals. And it was almost guaranteed that Pastor Chad was one of the few Pastors that felt this way. That made him upset, that made him very very upset. If there was thing that upset him it was the way Pastor Chad spoke. He preached the word of God as if he were God himself. And it sounded pretty convincing. Pastor Chad's constant bicker about homosexuality made Cameron feel like he was a little less than a human being.
Cameron never really considered himself gay. The thought had never crossed his mind, not until he saw Nash for the first time. There was something about him, something that just attracted him to Nash.
Of course at the time Cameron knew nothing about what being gay actually meant. He was thirteen the first time he saw Nash, and he'd been watching him ever since. Although you may find it creepy, Cameron couldn't help himself. Cameron prayed to God that no-one would notice him staring. And so far, no-one had, well as far as he was concerned anyway.
To Cameron, Nash was beautiful. Never before had he felt this way about a boy. And it scared him, it scared him so much.
For the past three years Cameron had built up this image of Nash in his head. What he would like, how his voice would sound, how his touch would feel, how his kiss would feel. Cameron would never admit to doing this. It was something he did in the comfort of his own mind.
Cameron begrudgingly walked into his room, shutting the door behind him. His room wasn't really a room, it was an attic. His mother had stuffed him up here after his father left. Cameron had a growing suspicion that he reminded his mother too much of his father. And that's probably why she treated him the way she does.
Cameron made do though. He decorated his room with posters of his favorite bands and artists. He paid for everything he owned, himself. He worked part-time and the local book store. He loved his job. Being around all those books made him happy.
Cameron sat on his small one person bed. Cameron's small room and small bed never discouraged him. He was happy with what he had and that's all that mattered to him. Most people didn't even have a bed.
Cameron pulled out his battered up iPhone3. He felt no need to get the latest phone. It had no appeal to him. As long as he could text and receive calls, he was happy. Not that he did any of that often. Sure, people have asked for his number now and then, but Cameron always declined.
A smile crept on Cameron's face. He had received a text. A rare occurrence as he hardly has anyone to text in the first place.
Cameron's smile increased bigger and bigger. He read the text over and over. Maybe he was over analyzing it? So what. He didn't care.
From Nash:
Hey it's Nash (incase you didn't know) :)
Cameron quickly typed back.
To Nash:
Hey :)
He wondered if the smily face was too much. But then again, without it, it would seem... bleak. And Cameron did not want to come of as bleak.
Nash texted back almost immediately.
From Nash:
We should hang out more often.
Cameron's heart began beating at an incredible speed. Cameron started pondering, what if Nash actually liked him? I mean, they haven't known each other for that long, although Cameron feels as if he's known Nash his whole life oddly enough.
To Nash:
Definitely
It was read almost immediately but Nash took a while to respond. This made Cameron nervous, this made Cameron so so nervous.
At a young age Cameron was diagnosed with clinical depression and severe anxiety. His parents overlooked this though. They didn't really think anything of it. Cameron however suffered greatly. It was so difficult for him to converse with people. And Nash was no exception, Nash made him nervous, Nash made him uneasy and yet Nash made him feel something else, Nash made him feel good.
Over the years Cameron learnt to deal with it. Controlling his depression and anxiety to the best of his abilities.
Cameron knew this strong infatuation was no good. He hardly knew Nash, but this was his chance. This was his chance to become friends with Nash. Get to know him.
Cameron looked down at his phone.
From Nash:
Lunch? Everyday ?
Everyday. Everyday. Spending lunch with Nash. 'God yes please' Cameron thought to himself.
To Nash:
Sounds good :)
Nash didn't respond. But Cameron didn't care. Cameron was on cloud nine.
