The Worst Of Luck

chapter twenty eight

A few months had passed and there was no sign of Aidan's chemo working. His hair had begun to fall out and his once bubbly personality was beginning to fade. He was a shell of the boy he once was. And it was nearly crushing me to watch him deteriorate like this.

"Luna I'm afraid there's not much more we can do after Aidan's next dose of chemo. It's too late to operate," Dr. David's sighed sadly, glancing at Aidan's pale figure that slept soundly beside us. "I can't loose him, he's all I have." I murmured, tears filling my eyes. I've lost 15 pounds since Aidan's diagnosing, I haven't been able to sleep or eat much since that day. Pack members have noticed, offering me food or time to rest in order to keep up strength, and of course I'm grateful but I can't leave Aidan and I'm too stressed out to eat.

"I understand and I'm deeply sorry, but from the looks of it I don't think he has much longer." Dr. David's said, his brown eyes flooding with guilt. My lungs felt like they were caving in on me as my anxiety spiked. "Let's say the chemo doesn't work, how much longer do we have?" I asked, afraid of the answer I would get. I knew it wouldn't be long. "If the chemo doesn't start working in the next few days, Aidan has about two weeks left." He said, looking down at the ground, afraid of how I might act I suppose. Tears filled my eyes as I received the news. Two weeks. Two weeks if the chemo didn't start working. That just isn't enough time, I need him. Dr. David's apologized and excused himself. My chest weighed heavy, as I glanced at my boy. My son. I couldn't loose him, I couldn't.

The room felt as if the air had been sucked right out of it, so I left the hospital for fresh air. As I stood outside the chilly air causing goosebumps to trail along my skin. I could see my breath in the air as I stared out at the horizon of trees next to me. I was beginning to numb out the pain of the outside world. Everyday flew past me, as if I was watching time pass from a passenger seat window.

Memories of the last few years with Aidan replayed in my mind. The dull ache these memories brought always present in my chest. The day I found out I was pregnant with him, to the day he was born, to now. The child I was terrified to once have, the one I considered a burden at the time, was the one who saved me in the end. He helped me find my way out of the darkness I had been drowning in for so long without even trying. And now I had to possibly let him go?

He has an entire life ahead of him, he was supposed to be the next alpha, meet his mate, have pups, be happy. All I've ever wanted for him was so to be happy, to grow old and live a good life. But now he's facing things far out of my control, and I can't do anything but sit here and watch his health deteriorate. Watch my own health deteriorate. I know that I have to stay strong, but how can I when the one thing that once made me strong is the thing I need to stay strong for? I can't do this without him. I need Aidan, more then anything else in the entire world. And the thought of him dying, leaving this world for a heaven up high is the most terrifying thought. I knew he'd be safe and happy with the moon goddess, but that doesn't mean I didn't want him to experience life. Life may be cold and cruel, but I wanted him to have the life I never could. I wanted him to grow up in a loving and supporting family, with a pack. And now I could never give him that.

I knew the circumstances weren't in our favour, every odd that could've turned against us has. No form of medicine or treatment has shown any progress. And that knowledge made me feel sick to my stomach. If he died, I knew a part of me that he helped me find again would die with him. The light of my life would be gone, and all that would be left is a numbing darkness.

How was I supposed to survive?

How do you live after the worst possible things happen?