Normally you get in to feel clean because you either haven't showered in a while, took a long walk which made you sweat, played in mud or got covered in something. Well that's not how this bath went.
I let the water fill the tub as I laid in it, letting it make waves over my body, almost like burying me in the water. I wasn't scared of the water getting too high and filling my lungs. I wasn't scared at all. I tried to scrub my body of the negativity in my life lately and I felt it leave as I rinsed the darkening bubbles from my body, the water leaving the tub and taking that darkness with it.
You never realize how afraid or unafraid of something you are, until you face it:
-I always thought I was terrified of heights but after riding roller coasters and a Farris wheel, I learned that I'm only scared of falling
-I thought I was scared of living for myself, I'm not. It's amazing knowing I'm in charge of my life. I get to decide what path I choose, no one else.
-I thought I was afraid of getting hurt, turn out I'm only afraid that I may not heal.
-I thought I needed you to feel complete but that's the biggest lie I told myself. I loved you but I need to love myself more.
