Journey

Chapter 12: Mary Wills

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April 3, 2013

By the grace of the Almighty, it has been a long time since I have penned my thoughts in this journal. I have much to share, first and foremost that I remain on U'Vinuduo. The Lord's will be done regarding my return to Earth. Many tasks have kept me diligently occupied, hence the delay in recording these experiences.

Before I proceed, let it be known that Ishku, my true self, resides within my mind once more. This knowledge comes from divinely guided journals penned by Mary Wills, a vessel I inhabited for a time. These sacred writings meant for my eyes, have influenced me to maintain the Mary Wills persona until the Lord deems it appropriate to return to Alsaashdyn. Furthermore, this chosen identity aids communication with the humans who accompany me.

Blessed be Sandy, who also graces me with her presence. Forgive my earlier neglect to mention her role – an administrator in the realm of politics. With the Lord's guidance and the assistance of ambassadors, one from each Earthly nation, Sandy facilitates communication regarding what knowledge their citizens require. These ambassadors assure me there has been no widespread panic or unrest. May this peace continue.

Sandy, with gentle concern, urges me to cast aside my anxieties concerning Earthly prejudices. While I have learned of the horrors of slavery, racism, and the mistreatment of those who identify as LGBT in American history (may the Lord have mercy), my greatest fear is for Jill's well-being. I have kept my private life veiled, solely for her protection. The truth will inevitably come to light. I can only imagine Jill's response – a fierce yet loving reprimand, followed perhaps by words of...

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For the Ishku in Mary's head, Jill could sense what she was thinking as she was writing. She stated, "Baby, I don't give a damn hell about idiots on Earth or where the hell ever they may come from. There will always be people that will hate, and there isn't one damn thing you can do about it." She paused, "when Sandy told me your fears of people on Earth will be prejudice, I told her similar to what just ran through your head just now."

She looked like she wanted to hide in shame, "I am so sorry baby. I am an idiot, but I have known so many LGBT in relationships like ours, and they were completely and totally devastated. I don't want you hurt."

"If they kick my ass emotionally or physically, know this my dearest love, it isn't because of you. I know you will never hurt me."

"I won't! Just the same, what will or may happen from this day forward, I am responsible. In all I have shared with them already, I knew and understood the responsibilities I will carry from now on everywhere I go. It will put a lot on the people of Earth since they have never seen other species from another world." She sighed, "I'm very relieved and concerned at the same time they didn't freak out seeing me as an Ishku."

"So that is why you haven't changed back to who you are supposed to be?"

"I planned to do that soon. Once these Ambassadors talk to everyone on Earth, I can use my Ishku persona to help bond the different species here on Earth. Trust me, I'm not hiding."

"Before I walked through the door, I saw the fear in you. Please talk to me."

Mary closed her journal, put it in the hutch compartment of her desk, and walked to sit on her wife's lap. "What I fear is the unknown. I'm preparing myself for the worst. Let us be realistic — baby doll — sooner or later the usual hateful and prejudiced behaviors will explode. I need to prepare to extinguish the flames quickly. What scares me is I have no damn clue how to do it."

"Now that these Ambassadors will be your voice for all the nations of Earth, that will help a lot, but like I said, shit will happen. If people insist on feeding the flames of stupidity, then no one will stop it."

She put her head on her wife's right shoulder after she cuddled up with her and replied, "I know, but I'm frightened all that has been put into motion can be destroyed by this behavior."

She whispered, "Don't worry about that until it happens. You will only create phantoms. This isn't like you Mary Wills."

"Know it isn't Jill Wills." She lifted her head so she could look at her wife, "I love calling you by my last name."

Jill smiled, "I wouldn't have it any other way."

She thought for a moment, "I don't think Alsaashdyn has a last name."

"It does not matter. She might have one, but she hasn't revealed it to you. If that is the case, then she wants you to live out your life by your sir namesake."

Mary was silent for a few moments.

"Pennies for your thoughts?"

"I was just wondering how she got her name."

"She said you're looking at all this in your perspective of time. Live your own life. She had stressed that to you."

"If that is the case, how..."

"Do it in your own way. Yes, she was you in all respects, but live out as Mary Wills. That's why you can change back and forth as Mary and Alsaashdyn."

"I want to be..."

"You can't be yourself if you are hopping about." Jill paused, "I have an idea. Stay as Mary Wills until you know for sure being an Ishku is needed. Everyone on Earth got to know Alsaashdyn. Now it's time to take the reins as your Ishku counterpart. Since it will take a long time to read all those journals, I think that is all you need to merge both worlds."

**********

After a few days, Mary got word from Sandy on the results of all that had been going on Earth after the Ambassadors did all they could in communicating with their countrymen and women.

Sandy replied, "So far so good."

"That is what concerns me."

Rosaline Roberts asked, "It might not be as bad as you may think. In the past, people have been quiet for they were taking it slow. For everyone on Earth to know there will commune with others in another world — despite how friendly they may be — it's a lot to take in."

Mary smiled, "A letter from President Obama reassured me that if anyone starts a fuss, there will be someone there to help quiet things down." She paused and continued, "please trust me, I don't want complexity, but something isn't right. It's too quiet. I hope I'm seeing this wrong — being on another planet, but for the likes of me, I can't shake this feeling."