Stone Fox Diary

my best friends best friend

I slept in the arms of my best friends best friend last night. He held me close, placed gentle kisses on the back of my neck, and for the first time since you I felt as though I were exactly where I was supposed to be. My best friend wants this for me, she started the entire affair, a set up really. I want this for me. The trust, the happy that comes along with laying in the arms of a protector. So why do I feel so confused and lost? Sometimes the highs can make you remember just how low you've been. I've decided though, I am going to let myself be happy in the new. I am allowed to feel for someone again even if its a crush. Even if it turns out to be nothing more than a simple fling and then its over. I am going to be happy. I am going to let myself feel. I am allowed to have emotion other than sadness or longing. It is ok that for one night, wrapped in his arms, I forgot all about all of the rest of you. Heartbreak didn't exist. You didn't exist. Our previous love didn't exist. The assault didn't exist. Only me and him and the moment.

This had to be early October because we started dating 10/10/2019

I am so glad I allowed myself to feel with him. Hes amazing. Hes real.March 29th 2020

SO we were never meant to actually date but I'm glad we did. Also hilarious to me that this was like 9 days after that last entry lmao. I wasn't quite over the Z situation as you can tell by my hesitation. This is kind of a cute story though. I went over to B's (the person I'm referring to here.) to watch a scary movie with them and our best friend at the time. Well when I was about to leave we were texting as I walked back to my car and they were scarred so I offered to come back. We had only met a couple other times but we really hit it off and after that night we were inseparable. We are still best friends now and probably always will be. 8/28/2023