A Court of Fire and Ash

Rowan

Yrene stared at me with complete shock in her eyes.
„What?”
„Please don't make me repeat it. You understood me.”
I could see tears filling her eyes.
„But how? What happened? How can you be so sure?”
This was unreal.
I felt like I was in a nightmare.
But I knew I couldn't wake up.
„The mating bond. It snapped.”
I could feel my voice cracking.
And my heart shattered into millions of pieces as Yrene started to cry and sank into my arms.
I could feel her pain.
But how could I comfort her if I felt the same pain?

There was nothing.
I was nothing.
How could I be anything without-
It hurt to even think about her.
I felt numb.
Like the walls were about to cave in but I wouldn't even notice.
I didn't feel anything.
Somehow I knew this was wrong.
But numbness was better than to feel anything.
I couldn't-
I was nothing without her.
Terrasen was nothing without her.

The worst part was yet to come.
I couldn't tell all her friends.
I couldn't relive that moment over and over again.
I couldn't see everyone of them breaking like Yrene did.
But it was my responsibility.
My duty.
Because now I was king of Terrasen.

With every step closer to the throneroom my pain grew stronger.
Even though Yrene was right beside me I felt alone.
But I couldn't give in to my feelings.
Because then I would never be able to do what I was about to.

As I entered the throneroom I could see that everyone was still there.
Choal, Elide and Dorian were talking to each other and I could hear their laughter.
How could they laugh, when all my joy had left the world.

Fenrys, Aedion and Lorcan were playing cards and looked happy and relieved.
Little did they know that I was about to destroy their happiness.

Elide, Lysandra and Manon were sitting in the corner and Elide and Lysandra were talking, while Manon just looked at Lysandra with fury in her eyes.

I could pinpoint the exact moment when Chaol saw Yrene. When his joy turned to worry.
„What's wrong?”
Suddenly it was completely silent and every single head turned to us.
„It's Aelin”, Yrene said.
And I knew it was my time to talk now. At least I only had to talk about it one time, because everyone was here.
„I- I was in the training room, when...when I could feel it.”
Aedion was standing in front of me now with concern in his eyes.
„When you could feel what?”
„The mating bond...it-it snapped.”

My voice wasn't louder than a whisper but I knew everyone heard what I had said.
And everyone knew what it meant.
And when Elide started crying all the joy was gone.