NINE [desperate]

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There had been three more performances and Stan tried his best to just watch so he'd get used to it. In case he'd ever dream about this place again. After that not much had happened. Some men are getting some "special attention" and Stan is glad that he mostly gets ignored by the dancers. The only one he actually wants to be near is Kyle, with his bright eyes, messy hair and the way he had laughed about his awkwardness. "Stan?" He flinches and looks up into Kyle's face. Where did he come from? He has changed once again, this time into a silver chrome look. Everything is shiny like fine polished metal, the shoes, the hotpants, the tanktop, the blazer and the choker around his neck. The sharp cool tone makes his reddish hair look even softer and warmer. "Do you want me to give you a little tour?" Kyle offers his hand smiling so Stan gets up and takes it without thinking about it for another second or askimg him what he means by "tour". Kyle leads him through the pond of tables and chairs and Stan can feel how people are staring at him and although he usually hates this kind of attention, he doesn't care right now. All that matters in this moment is Kyle's warm hand holding his and the way he smiles to himself while taking short glances at Stan out of the corners of his eyes. They arrive at the two doors labelled "Private" and opens the right one. "The other one leads to the boss' office and to the room for the cleaning supplies so we can skip that. Here is where all the pre and after show magic happens." They enter a small hallway with red carpet and vintage style wallpaper. There are only a few doors on both sides and at the end a spiral staircase signals that there is a second floor. "Behind the one right here is the changing room, so you sadly can't go in there, sorry. On the left is our break room but what I actually wanted to show you lies behind this door." He opens the last one on the right and pulls Stan through. What he sees seems like a small private stage with red sofas on two sides of the room. "Those who pay a little extra get a private performance in here. It makes guests often feel a little more...special." Stan nods slowly but isn't sure what to say. "And why did you bring me here?" "To show you something, sit down." Stan does as he is told and watches with nervous eyes as Kyle locks the door and then bends down to the sound system. "You said you liked my pole dancing right? Well you only got to see a small portion of the things I can do so I thought I'd show you some more if you want me to." He turns around, giving Stan a questioning look. "Y-yeah, sure. I'd love that." Kyle turns on the song, takes off his blazer and gets onto the circular stage. "Okay this performance is a bit older but it's fun so I think you'll like it." The song starts to play and with the first lyric Kyle is already up in the air, his arms and legs moving graviously. He starts to lipsync with a shining smile. It is almost as if he grinning, nearly laughing and this time Stan can't help but to reflect his wide smile. Kyle seems to actually have a lot of fun, no matter if he's elegantly moving on the pole or banging his head like a maniac when he is back on the ground. Stan starts to feel bad for judging him earlier. He enjoys to dance and he enjoys the attention he's getting so where is the problem? The only problem is Stan's own ignorance. Fuck. Kyle's legs shine bright underneath the spotlights. He must be using make up of some sorts. Everything is so perfect that Stan almost forgets that this is just a dream and not reality. Kyle walks towards, as if he is singing just for him. The song ends and Kyle gives a quick bow before jogging over to the music player to turn it off again. Stan can't help but to applaud. "That was amazing." Kyle starts to blush again while putting his blazer back on and walking over. After finishing with clapping Stan wants to get up but Kyle pushes him back down. The sudden dominant move sends shivers down Stan's spine. "I thought maybe we could talk some more. I find you very refreshing." "Oh I-" Kyle sits down on his lap so that they are now looking at each other face to face. "Yes?" Stan's heart starts to race. "Hi," he whispers. Kyle chuckles quietly and puts his arms around Stan's neck. "Hi." His face. So soft. His lips. So sweet. His eyes. So bright. And his crotch... way too close. Stan takes up all of his inner strength and puts his hands on Kyle's waist. He smiles. "Do you still want to know why my name is Java?" All he can do is nod. "I don't know exactly myself but I have two theories. The first one is the one I tell all guests. Java, just like the island, stands for my 'natural beauty.'" Air quotes. "And that being with me is like a fun island holiday. You know, lying on the beach and enjoying the sun, renting a yacht...discovering hidden waterfalls. Smelling wild flowers. Dancing through the nights, drunk on tequila and fresh love. That is the fantasy I try to sell them. I'm not the power bottom who you'll have the wildest sex with, who'll make you drool my name. I'm not the mysterious hot babe who'll play with your heart while you try relentlessly to win me over. I'm that one unforgettable fun summer love who will make you feel young and exciting." Stan's heart aches at the word summer love. Kyle doesn't even know how right he is with that. "The second theory is less glamurous. When I applied for this job my boss offered me coffee but I said 'No thanks, I don't drink coffee' and he just started to laugh for ten minutes straight. It was the weirdest and most hilarious thing for him. An adult that doesn't like coffee. You barely get to see that these days." Stan can't help but to let out a chuckle. "So Java like the coffee brand?" "Exactly." Kyle smiles as well and starts to stroke Stan's hair. Stan can barely hear his own thoughts over the sound of his beating heart. "I think you're doing a great job at selling that fantasy. Although if I was in that scenario, I'd hope to have you in my life for more than just one summer. I bet we'd get along so well that I'd propose to you on the last day so we can run away together and then our summer would never end, it would turn into our life." Kyle's facial expression goes silent for a second or two before he starts to smile again. But it feels different. "Oh god, so you're not just a responsible nice guy but also a hopeless romantic? What did I get myself into this time?" He takes a strand of hair that has fallen into Stan's face and pushes it away. "Please, you're the one who started talking about secret waterfalls and being drunk on love." Kyle rolls his eyes playfully. "All I'm saying is that...I think that is what you deserve. The perfect love story I mean. Because you seem like a great person. And you're beautiful. Sorry, that was probably too corny." Stan blushes from embarrassment. Kyle's eyes fixate his. And then his face comes closer. His lips land on Stan's mouth and all of a sudden he is kissing him. Stan freezes, his brain shuts off and his hands, still lying on Kyle's small waist, start to shake. Then he thinks fuck it, it's just a dream, kisses back and pulls him closer. It is a sweet kiss and it reminds Stan of the first one he and real Kyle had shared at the campfire. Just that this Kyle is way more experienced and so the sweetness soon turns into a type of desperate passion as if they are both drowning and only by kissing they can survive. Stan knows why he feels that way. He had to wait for so long, way too long, to be finally able to touch this boy again. Not a single day passed where he didn't think about his sweet lips and pure laugh. But he doesn't know what makes Kyle this desperate, why he is pressing Stan so closely to him that not a single sheet of paper would fit between their chests. But apart from that the kiss stays an innocent one. There are no tongues or hands under shirts or silent moans, only the needs of two very lonely humans. But then it ends as suddenly as it had started. Kyle pulls back slightly and takes a big breath. And yes, Stan is a bit disappointed. If it was for him, he would have taken him here and now, would have claimed his neck and chest and ripped off Kyle's clothes to finally make him his. But then again he wants Kyle in more than just that way. "Oh wow okay. You could have told me that you're such a great kisser. I would have prepared myself better." "Well I didn't see it coming." "No of course you didn't." Kyle laughs and gets up, pulling Stan with him. "I need to get back to work now." They step out into the hallway. It still is completely empty but Stan can hear the loud music from the club pressing itself forcefully through the walls. "Where do the stairs lead to by the way?" Kyle's smile fades for a second. "Maybe you'll find out another time. Here." He pulls out a silver bobby pin from his hair and puts it into Stan's hand. "Next time you're here, and I do hope that you will return, show that to security and they'll let me know you're here." Stan looks at the shiny piece of plastic and then closes his fist. "I wonder how often you had to buy new ones because you kept giving these away to other responsible nice guys." Kyle winks cheekily. "I haven't done that in a long time so you better feel honored." Stan smiles at him. So he is special now? Thank you, dream gods. "Bye Stan, I hope I get to see you again very soon." Kyle comes a bit closer, touches his arm and kisses his cheek. Stan blushes. "Bye...Java." The timing is perfect because as soon as he has finished that sentence, his stomach starts to turn again. He quickly leaves the backstage area, giving Kyle one last wave and manages to reach the toilets just in time before everything goes black again.

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