High School Sweetheart <3

Part 35 (Goodbye)

Gaia's P.O.V.

"Blake I can't... I don't want to hurt you, I don't want to trap you in this curse I'm in"

"Hurt me? Baby, you're hurting me now... All I want is to make you happy"

"And I want you to be happy too"

"I am happy... Waking up next to you couldn't make me happier. You are my world, you're my everything. I love you, why can't you understand that?"

"You're gonna stop loving me... You're gonna want kids and be mad I can't give them to you and you're gonna walk out the door... you're gonna walk out on us."

"I talked to your mom. She told me about your aunt's husband" he cups my face. "That's not us Gaia. We're strong, and I don't wanna be with you to have kids. I want to be with you becaus I love you, during the good times and the bad... You forgave me for something that is unforgivable. You think I'm gonna leave you for something that is out of our control?"

His words get to me but I'm too scared... "I can't" I shake my head with tears forming in my eyes. I start soothing Asher when he begin to cries on my arms and walk to the couch with Blake following.

 "I don't understand... did you stop loving me?"

"Oh God no... I never stopped loving you and I never will"

"Then why are you running away?"

"I'm not running away. It's okay baby" my attention goes to Asher.

"What do you call this then?... This isn't about the baby, you're scared about something"

I love the way he can always read me but not today "Blake..." I place Asher on the floor.

"Is it us getting married?" he asked.

"About that... I can't marry you" I start taking off the ring.

"What are you doing?" he asked with a broken heart. "Don't... Gaia, don't do this!"

"I'm sorry" my voice cracks as I hand him the ring.

"What did I do? I can fix it, just tell me" he ased desperately.

"You didn't do anything... Just go home" a tear escapes my eye.

"Is it Dustin? Did he trheaten you? Are you starting to have feeling for him again?"

"No... No, he has nothing to do with this"

"Then why?" he kept asking.

"I already told you"

"That's not an explanation!" he punches the wall... "We have a child together, you're just gonna throw that fact away? Just tell me!!"

"I don't love you anymore!!" I blurt out and take control of myself again "I've fallen out of love"

"Bullshit!! You just told me you loved me a second ago, what the hell is wrong with you?!" he was getting out of control. And who wouldn't? I'm leaving him without giving him a reason... "You don't want this. If you did you wouldn't be crying" he says more calmly as I wipe my tears with my long sleeves.

"I'm gonna leave. But we are not ending here... I'll give you time to think about whatever it is that's going through your head. And while you do think about this... no matter what you do, no matter what you choose, I will never stop loving you. You will always be the love of my life... nothing will ever change that" he placed the ring on the small table next to him and walks out the door...

I love him, but fear always gets the best of me. I can't bare to get my heart broken by him again, I can't bare it... I don't understand, I can always talk to him about everything. So why can't I just tell him why I'm scared of loving him?