Dreams & Jinxes

Chapter 3

Many people handle depression in varies kinds of ways. Some believe in self-harm, but what there really doing is hurting the people around them. Hurting them with worry and confusion.

Some shut down, again that depression is self-absorbed. Every time something like this has happened around me, I have told these people to man up. I tell them, you have to find the fire and make that happen.

However there are those people who encourage this behaviour. Saying that it's alright to cry. That tears are normal, or even worse they say their sorry. Then they wonder why we snap.

My cure for depression, one simple word. Work. The feel of fixing fences in the heat, the crunch of a fence post as they break or snap or the wire as it is tightened. I guess it’s just the country girl in me.

However, try finding a fence to fix or something in the same category, when you work on one of the best eventing yards in the state. Not only are all the fences wooden, post and rail, there always kept perfect, as for something breaking and needing hard work to fix, it’s very unlikely.

So I guess that is how I ended up here, standing at the doorway of the stables.

I have been up since 4:30 am, and really needed a run, but broken ribs make that a little hard. Leaving me heading to the stables.

Walking through the aisle, I looked at every horse. Remembering all their stories, all the rides I’d had on them. Most in which I had ate dirt. I remember kicking too hard before a jump, landing and wobbling sending the young horses into panic, putting them into deep spots, unbalancing them before a jump and the list goes on.

I have had many falls, and minor brakes, some being laughable some being a bit more serious. I had spent so much time perfected them, having to work so much just to break through the ice.

Stopping at a stall I let out a chuckle. I remembered running face first into Riley here. I guess bystanders would say that I had tackled him. I say that I he needed to learn to stand up straight.

Saying that I sent him flying was an understatement, when I say flying I mean flying as in three meters backwards into a wheelbarrow full of dirty sawdust and horse shit. My previous sad expression was gone, replacing it was shock and amusement.

His expression was so classical, he had a shocked look on his face and was covered in horse shit and wet sawdust, and there I was laughing so god dam hard. I thought that I was going to die.

Then the stall was empty, a private stall for a student. It soon became Jinx's stall. My only place of saviour, most of the time being the place that everyone would find me at.

Next to his stall was an amazingly breed palomino mare, she was stunning. One of those horses that made you suck in your breath every time you would see her.

She had the best jumping bloodlines in the stable, and I was lucky enough to be half owner of her with coach. I guess that is why I chose her. A horse that could jump, I needed that thrill. The workers aren't due on till 6 so I had plenty time to ride.

A gallop on the course would be ideal. Something that Summer will always give. I needed to stop thinking so much, I needed to stop myself from letting my thoughts run into that dark hole of sadness and depression. I needed to concentrate and not allow them to think of the all the possible outcomes for me. Only the good ones.

Three days I have been home and I feel like I'm going mad. I'm not allowed to do anything. At all. Apparently broken ribs do that to you. Let me tell you something, I have had broken ribs before and I still worked. It hurt a lot, but I still went on. Now it's all different, and I am hopping mad.

That’s why I'm now going for a ride, I won't have to think. The impossible will happen.

I guess I'm just nervous.

Things will change today.

Jinx is coming home.

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Co-Author’s Note:

Hey guys, I’m the Co-Author/editor thingy for Dreams and Jinxes. I update the book, edit the chapters and fix up all Essy’s grammar and spelling mistakes.

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This was just a filler chapter of her memories. Hope your liking the book so far we are trying to update as often as humanely possible.

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Let me know in comments if there are any mistakes, I try my best to edit and punctuate after Essy as written the chapters.

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Please vote and leave us suggestions it’s greatly appreciated. Next update will be in the next couple of days if Essy gets her ass into gear.

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Hope your liking the book, bye!

Kara x