Boy of my dreams <<Mattia Polibio🦖

Part 12

Its my third day without speaking to Mattia or Jo.

I have seen Jo once in the kitchen but she didn't even try to apologize. She is  hurt because Alejandro left her and Mattia didn't text me since that day.

I have been watching movie after movie and I still don't feel better. I am in pain, real big pain. I wonder what he is thinking. Does he feel sorry? Did he even think once of me? One thing I learned from this shit: never trust someone as hot and beautiful as Mattia. It really sucks to be the second option.

Before I am about to cry again I decide to go outside and call my dad. I don't know why but I really miss him. No matter what he did or what he said to me.

I grab a pair of joggers and my eyes travel to Mattias hoodie. Damn it. My tears are close but I can hold them back. I close my wardrobe and start walking outside.

Its pretty cold and I miss Mattias warm touch and hugs but anyway I start to call my dad.

After the third ring he finally answers.

„Hello who is this?" He asks confused.

He didn't even save my number. Ouch.

„Hey dad."

„Oh, hello y/n." Is all he says.

„How are you?"

„I am fine, I hope you are too."

He doesn't care. I know him too well.

„Yeah, I am fine too." I try to smile even tho I know he can't see me.

„I miss you honey." He starts sobbing.

„I- I miss you too dad." I start to cry.

„I am sorry for what I said to you when I was ... you know, drunk." I can hear how embarrassed he is.

„It's okay dad. It's okay." No it's fucking not.

„I am the worst father. Is that true?" He asks and I don't know what to say so I just stay quiet.

When I can't hear him responding, I start wondering so I look at my phone, it's dead. I don't have any battery anymore. Damn it but now I don't have to hold an embarrassing small talk with my father.

I sit on a bench and try to remember my mom. Her smile, laugh and her beautiful face. I really miss her in times like these.

I feel a familiar hand on my shoulder and when I turn around it is Mattia.

He looks broken to be honest. I haven't seen him like that before.

He sits next to me without saying a word and I am thankful. Now we are here, sitting next to each other staring at the ground. Nice.

„I'm sorry" Mattia whispers, still staring at the ground.

I stay quiet.

„I miss you."

„Your second option." I correct him annoyed.

„No. I swear it's not like that y/n. I didn't kiss you because I know I can't have Jo. She was desperate and we promised we would never tell what happened to anybody but Jo told me she can't do that so we decided to tell you and Ale." He apologizes.

I look at him and he looks at me. He is staring into my goddamn soul again.

„I don't want to be your second option. Please promise me I will never be." Tears flow down my cheek.

„No. Never. I promise you." He puts his arm around me and hugs me.

I can't believe I am doing this but he deserves a second chance. I have forgiven my father so many times, that means I have to forgive Mattia too but it doesn't change the fact that I am still hurt and mad.