Little Writings From A Little Person

Destroyed Senses

I may have hearing problems, however I can still hear the venom in your words as you screamed

Now I panic if someone's voice is off in the slightest

I can still hear the snide insults you threw about

Thinking I am fat, gross, immature, stupid, and so on

I can still hear the destruction of whatever was in your way

Glass shattering, items falling, pets yowling

I can still hear my family crying

From the pain they should never have felt

If only I could've been more blind

I can still see the house a mess of your doing

Flipped recliners, broken frames, scattered papers

I can still see the tears falling from cheeks

That should only fall during happy moments

I can still see the speedometer at too high a number

Fearing my life would end in bent metal and flames

I can still see your teeth gritted tightly

A flashing signal to run, hide, and stay silent

Too bad I became numb too late

I can still feel the hurt of your words and threats

Like daggers stabbing my very being

I can still feel the tears stinging my eyes before falling

For reasons no child should ever experience

I can still feel the needless physical discipline

Fly swatters, belts, palms, all on our skin

I can still feel the consuming helplessness and loneliness

Never thinking I could stop it all or get help

Mom's cooking is fantastic but you ruined meals

I can still taste the dinners I never wanted to eat

That table was feared, for many meals ended in fights

I can still taste the blood from my tongue and cheeks

A struggle to not say anything to escalate the matter

I never thought scent had much importance till now

I can still smell the alcohol on your breath

Clinging to my skin whenever you were in my face

I can still smell my pillows, blankets, and stuffed toys

Being latched onto when I was scared and lonely

I wish you could have just been a father