vidcon // lams youtube au

5

omg im so sorry I forgot about this book and I wrote it when I was not funny, bad news im still not funny

john pov:

the familiar tune of 'ocean man' by ween fills my ears, i take a look at the caller ID, it shocked me. i really thought he was over me but i guess not. i press the accept button and his really high pitched ugly sobs rang through the room. ocean man really isn't a good pick for your ex.

"listen, what the hell do you want from me you psychopath? it has literally been 3 years, god damn it!" i yell into the phone.

"john baby, i'm so sorry! i know you don't believe me but i will prove that you're mine." i hear him say creepily. ew.

"shut the fuck up, you cheated on me multiple times, abused me physically and mentally, took my money, and never apologized until i called the police on you. you're ugly, too! pick a struggle." i went off. period.

"it was a mistake!"

"bitch you're the definition of a mistake."

i look over at alex, who was wheezing so hard that his face looked like a shade of crimson.

"i'll come over to new york, i'll make it up to you! i promise i'll change!"

"enough, kinloch. you're in jail! how in the name of holy cheese balls would you come over here anyway?"

"just wait, baby. you'll see me sooner or later."
francis whispers into the phone. that's real fucking creepy. i quickly hang up and block him. he already has to serve 25 years in prison, what does he want?

"damn, that was quite a show." alex chokes out, trying to stifle his laughter.

"very entertaining." he says, trying to calm himself down. i roll my eyes playfully and sat the phone down. my eyes scan across the room, i find myself staring into the camera in front of us.

"wait, is the camera rolling..?" i ask. he nods and pats my shoulder as some kind of strange reassurance. "we can cut it out." he mouths to me.

"no, keep it in, it'll make good views and maybe a good storytime later on." i wink. we laugh and get to filming.

time skip~

"alexander moans into john's fluffy hair, an euphoric feeling torches his insides-"

"that's enough! we aren't continuing this. why did we think that this was a good idea? holy hell. i might get demonitized for this!" i yell out in embarrassment.

"I don't understand why I'm bottom." alex pouts and says towards the camera.

"look at you, you think you're short ass is a top?m?" i said jokingly.

"my waist be smaller than my brain, my ass be juicier than that chicken, my thighs-"

"stop. okay, see you in the next video bye!" i rushed to say. alexander laughs while i shake my head, laughing a bit as well. we finish editing and we bid farewell for now, it was fun.