Dear Diary

Chapter 12

Sunday - also known as the one day Sophia is guaranteed to see her father. If she hasn't seen him at all in the week, she will definitely see him on Sunday as every week they go to church. Even when they move towns, her father will already have a church in mind.

Sophia sighed as she looked at herself in her mirror. Her hair was left loose in slight curls and she left her make-up minimal, as usual. But her attire was something else entirely. She wore a pretty lilac top that had diamante straps, white jeans and black ballet flats. She almost didn't recognize herself, but her father wanted her to dress more lady-like for church.

She honestly never understood her father's logic. Why treat his own daughter like she's a ghost and yet go to church every single Sunday; come rain, hail and snow? Wasn't that sort of being a hypocrite? Christian men shouldn't treat their families like that. At least, that's what she thought.

Steeling herself for an emotionless ride ahead, Sophia did the last finishing touches to her make-up and grabbed her bible before walking down to the front door. She found her dad already seated in his Mercedes and she locked the house before climbing in the passenger seat.

As she expected, the ride was silent and before long they arrived at a pretty building made of stone. It seemed to be at least a hundred years old, judging by the way it was built and the massive old oaks that surrounded it. People were milling about at the entrance as her father pulled into one of the parking bays and they stepped out the vehicle, the warm summer breeze making Sophia's hair flutter slightly.

She fell in step with her father and took note of what he was wearing: a white button-up shirt with long sleeves, not overly formal black dress pants and shoes. His hair didn't need to be styled because of its short length.

Sophia expected it to be as any other new church where they would politely greet other people on their way inside and sit in a pew right at the back and closest to the entrance, but that didn't happen this time.

"Sophia?"

Sophia turned to see who called her, her father stopping as well. Her eyes widened slightly in surprise when she saw Luke walk up to them with a smile on his face. 

"I thought it was you. Didn't recognise you without your jacket," he said light-heartedly.

Sophia was at a loss for words. She had not expected Luke to be a church-goer. The heartthrob of Ridgeview High, the boy with the insanely good looks and athletic skills, the one all girls fought over (she's heard some conversations in the girl's bathroom in just one week) ... making the effort to go to church and be a good person. She's never heard of it before. But she knew for a fact, that most people in a congregation weren't really Christians. There were many who go to church every week, but don't believe ... and Sophia isn't far off from being one of them.

When she was younger, she guessed she did believe, but as she grew older and reality hit her, she began to doubt her faith. Why would God take her mom away from her? Why would He allow her father to treat her like he did? Didn't He care at all? She used to pray about it all the time, but as she went into her teen years she found that her prayers seemed to fall on deaf ears. So much so, that she eventually gave up on them.

She guessed that the only reason she probably still went to church without a fuss was because it was routine for her. And at least if she didn't see her father all week, it would be guaranteed that she'll see him here, where they act like a normal but slightly distant family. It felt nice to pretend that he loved her once a week. That was probably why she kept going.

She felt no fulfilment from singing the hymns as her mother did. No joy or internal peace as the Gospel was preached. Nothing. To her, church was just another day at school, but on a Sunday. In fact, the only time she even read a bible nowadays was in church alone.