Dear Diary

Chapter 40

I don't know how long we sat there in silence, but the crying had finally subsided. Although I didn't really let myself cry either, more like my eyes just wouldn't stop running. 

My mind roamed back to the previous events and I couldn't help but think of the whole reason this happened. Richard. If he hadn't asked me to be his 'pretend' girlfriend, I would never be viewed in such a bad light right now. After all, I'm supposed to be dating one of the hottest guys in the school, but now 'cheating' on him with the other hottest guy. Vicious rumours. And where was Richard now? Certainly not here to comfort me and there is no way he hasn't heard the rumours.

The thoughts suddenly gave me the urge to vent to whoever was there to listen. "I wish Richard hadn't asked me," I muttered and clenched my hands in Cole's shirt before instantly releasing them. I didn't want his shirt crumpled.

Cole paused rubbing my back and I could feel his chest vibrate beneath my hands as he asked, "What do you mean?"

I slowly leaned back to gaze at his handsome face. I better tell him the truth. He deserves it after all he's done for me. 

"Richard and I ... aren't actually dating. He asked if we could pretend to date as there was a psycho girl after him and the only way to get her off him was if he was no longer available. If ... if I had known that something like this would happen, I never would have agreed."

Cole was quiet for a moment. I guess he was busy processing the information. 

"Why did you?" he asked.

I sighed and looked away from that smouldering gaze that made my insides twist. "He's my best friend ... and I will do anything for a friend."

He was silent as he stared at me and I felt my face heat up from the attention. At least my blush covered my red nose, but I'm pretty sure my eyes were red and glossy. "So ..." he finally said, "you guys aren't together then?"

I shook my head. "No, we're not," I let out a small almost disbelieving chuckle. "I'm actually not allowed to date in high school."

Cole nodded his head at the information and I realised my mistake a little too late. If he did ever view me like that, I just shot my remaining chances with him in the bud. But who was I kidding anyway? He's Cole: the gorgeous, tall, tanned, strong bad boy who can get any girl he wants. So, why would he ever be interested in plain, shy and with an overly protective mother me?

"Do you need help with anything?" Cole asked after a moment's silence as he looked me over with his eyes.

"Not unless you have a spare girl's uniform in your locker?" I joked, trying to make light of the situation, but it didn't last long as my recent frustration disappeared and my mind remembered all those insults. 

I looked down and scrunched my face slightly to hold in the tears. But then I realised that although I had moved away from Cole slightly my hands were still resting on his chest and his were casually on my hips. I blushed scarlet and I remembered how a position like this got me in this mess in the first place.

I slowly inched away from him. He took the hint, and his arms returned to his sides. I gingerly rubbed my wet, cold arms, already regretting putting distance between us. 

"I ... I know what it looked like, you and me coming out of a classroom after hours, but I just can't think of someone who would spread such a rumour. I mean, I don't have any enemies that I know of, so what did I do?"

Cole was quiet, deep in thought. I gave a shaky sigh. "Anyway, I best try and dry myself off," I muttered and slowly climbed to my feet before making my way out the cubicle.