oneshots // bsd

dazai // ＮＳＦＷ

notes: cheating! dazai, toys, knifeplay, blood kink, slight bondage, bottom! dazai, orgasm denial, begging, really unhealthy relationships. chuuya's the only good person in this

you weren't a fool, you knew what dazai was doing. he was aware of your feelings for him, and he was using it to his advantage. but all of that was future you's problem, right now you were too intoxicated by his touch to care. his lips felt too good on your skin, the way your name fell so gracefully from his lips. ah, he was toying with you.

"osamu," you gasped into his hair, pulling him closer to you, grasping for any genuine warmth from him. he groaned softly, whispering your name sweetly against your breasts as he pressed the head of his member against your entrance.

his touch was deceptively sweet. "ah, you're so gorgeous," he mumbled against your jaw, the intimacy making you mewl with delight. his hand delicately stroked your cheek as you arched up against him.

"kiss—ah—" you sobbed, fingers twisting in the sheets, "p-please—" he chuckled, peppering your face with kisses before tugging on your swollen lips with his teeth. you moaned, closing your eyes and orgasming. he picked up the pace, chasing his own climax before pulling out, cumming on your stomach. you panted, trying to catch your breath as dazai kissed your cheek affectionately. "i love you."

"so cute," he murmured sleepily as you stroked his hair out of his eyes. he wasn't in love. his feelings for you were coldly indifferent and you knew that. this wasn't love, this was a perverse rendition of it.

you pulled the covers over the two you, kissing down his jaw as he laughed lowly. you pushed the thoughts out of your mind, enjoying the lazy bliss post-sex.

you were lonely, you supposed, that's why you stuck with him through this charade. that's why you let him have his way, you were too scared he might leave if you made the wrong move. that's why even when he came home with marks on his skin that you didn't make, you pretended not to notice. dazai patched up everything with sweet, empty words and you willingly fell for them, desperately trying to keep this blissful bubble of yours intact. you were predictable to him and he was getting bored.

from the outside, the two of you looked like affectionate lovers, cute and infatuated, but you wouldn't put such a label on your relationship. your coworker, chuuya, was the only one who knew better. "he's only dating you because you're mafia. you're going to end up hurt, you know."

you gave him a tired smile, sitting on his desk. "that's a problem for future me." he was concerned for you, but for now, you were happy believing dazai's falsities, so you disregarded your friend's worry.

you went home that day to see dazai with another woman. you weren't surprised, but that didn't mean you weren't hurt. he wasn't even trying to hide it anymore. he ignored you but you knew he knew you were there before you cleared your throat. the woman quickly stopped, covering her breasts as dazai looked up from her. "it seems like i'm interrupting." the woman seemed confused before shock filled her. it seemed she only just understood your relationship. you gave them a smile. "excuse me, then."

the woman quickly got up. "no, i'm sorry! excuse me!" she quickly got dressed and scurried out. you could see why dazai picked her, she was cute.

you looked at dazai expectantly. waiting for him to start spewing his saccharine lies. "at least she has more dignity than you do," you said, heading into the kitchen.

"she has more dignity than both of us." you laughed in agreement bitterly. he wrapped his hands around your waist and you felt about a year's worth of rage bubbling in your throat.

"don't fucking touch me," you hissed, pointing the knife at his throat. he let go as you pushed him away. "how fucking stupid do you think i am? you think i don't—" you stopped yourself, turning back around and steadying yourself. dazai watched on, an assuring smile on his lips while apathy danced in his eyes.