oneshots // bsd

ranpo

you couldn't help but stare at ranpo as he talked with dazai, both of them skirting their responsibilities. you joined the agency out of admiration for him—his unwavering and joyous nonchalance allured you. at some point after you joined the agency as an intern, your admiration of the great detective became love and you were only realised when you found yourself unable to sleep and your mind filled with erotic fantasies of the man. your lust and love for him swirled in your mind until you find yourself unable to be around him in fear he'll know. his emerald eyes had an affinity to see through your walls into the very essence of your being.

you looked away from ranpo, back at the papers you were reviewing. it was better to finish off your work and head home before you made a fool of yourself. "[name]! do you want to have lunch with us?" dazai asked, bounding over to you as he grinned mischievously. "ranpo was telling me about this new dessert place that opened up!"

"actually, mr. dazai i was just going to finish my work and go home," you mumbled.

"so it's settled! me, you and dazai will go to the café down the road!" before you could protest, you were practically dragged out of your chair by your colleagues.

"guys, i..." you trailed off, when they looked at you. sighing you relented. "fine." you closed the lid of your laptop, and put your papers in your bag as you trailed after the two.

the streets were littered with people and the dessert place seemed to be in full capacity. you looked around, suddenly noticing that dazai was gone.

"he said he had a call," ranpo answered your question before you even asked with a grin. "shall we go in?" he purred, taking your hand and dragging you in. you blushed as his slender fingers wrapped around your wrist, snaking down to your palm. the two of you took a seat at the back of the cafe, looking through the menu. "what are you gonna order? i want the marshmallow cheesecake and the salted caramel milkshake!"

you hummed thoughtfully. "i want a...caramel tart," you stated after much deliberation. he grinned before walking to the counter. he ordered your food and came back to your table with a triumphant smile. "how much was it? i'll pay you."

"no need! you're struggling with rent anyway, aren't you?" you blushed. how did he even know that? the food arrived and the two of you dug in until he spoke again. "you want to fuck me, don't you?"

you spat out your tart. "wh-wh-who? what are you-what are you talking about?! what are you even saying?!" you stammered, feeling lightheaded from embarrassment. "i-no, no i don't!"

ranpo furrowed his brows, making a buzzer noise. "wrong! you do! you've got the hots for me!" he pointed at you and you felt yourself getting redder and redder by the second. "so? what is it? what do you like about me? my amazing intellect? my awesome personality? i can probably figure it out myself but where's the fun in that? oh, what fantasies do you have about me?"

"are you making fun of me?" you asked, frowning at him. you didn't ask for these feelings and this is exactly what you feared would happen. with a sigh, you stood up. "i'll transfer you the money. thanks for the food."

you didn't stay overtime, you avoided ranpo like he had leprosy and only did your work. your plan was to stay away from him until your feelings dissipated, but you suspected that would take a while. maybe it would be best for you to just take a different job, or at least ask to be moved to a different shift.

"hey, [name]! are you free for lunch?" dazai asked suddenly one day. he had a hand on the papers you were proofreading for atsushi, effectively stopping you from ignoring him.

"sorry, mr dazai, i've got other plans."

dazai pouted. "i haven't even said anything yet!" you stabbed him with your pen and he yelped, moving his hand away. "what's wrong? you've been off all week."

"im not in the mood, mr dazai."

"but—"

"hey dazai, can you take me to the sweet shop? i want some popping candy!" ranpo's voice made your heart flutter. quietly, you stood up while dazai looked between the two of you, making an excuse to your supervisor as you left, taking your work and your laptop to the cafe downstairs.

you finished your work and went home early that day, only to see ranpo waiting for you at your door. he was sat on the floor, head resting on his knees until he saw you. you turned around to leave but stopped, realising you didn't have anywhere else to go. "can you open it already? i'm cold."

"what do you want, mr ranpo?" you brushed past him, fumbling with the keys as you took a mental vote of whether or not to let him in or slam the door on his face.

"i wanted to say, you know...sorry." you raised a brow at him. "i wasn't making fun of you, i was happy. well, i mean, no ones ever really had those sorts of feelings about me."

"and for good reason." you unlocked the door, letting him in.

"how mean!" you chuckled at his whine, setting down your bag on the futon. he smiled with relief, kicking his shoes off. "so, am i forgiven?"

you tapped your chin thoughtfully. "no," you answered finally. "it's fine if you don't feel the same way, it's just—"

"huh? i never said that." you looked up at him. "who said i didn't like you?"

"what?"

"your the only one who can make stupidity cute."

"i'm not stupid!" you paused, your face erupting a beautiful shade of scarlet. "you think i'm cute?"

"that's what i said, isnt it?" he leaned forward, pecking the corners of your lips. "am i forgiven now?" you blushed, unable to speak as you nodded dumbly. he grinned. "good!" he chirped before adding, "now, tell me about those fantasies."

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i need you to understand that ranpo is a very underrated sexy