cut yourself in conversation | gerbert

chapter twelve

gerard sips his warm hot chocolate as he listens to bert talk. they just got to bert's apartment and relaxing on the couch together. sat pretty close together with a blanket laid over their laps since they're still pretty chilly from being out in the cold. he enjoys listening to bert talk, tell stories. he's so interesting to gerard, has a much more interesting life than gerard has. though that doesn't stop bert from asking about gerard anytime he gets. "so tell me more about you, you never talk about yourself. any love interests? close friends? family?"

"i don't know about 'love interest', but i guess there's someone i have a thing for. all of what were my close friends are either moved away or we're always too busy to find time to talk. i have some distant family in maryland, but other than that it's just me, mikey and my mom." gerard explains before taking another sip of the warm, mouth watering hot chocolate. watching as bert seemingly invested sits up a little more, facing toward him more.

"do i know who this not so love interest love interest is? and where's your father? if you don't mind me asking, you don't have to answer if you'd perfer not too." bert asks curiously. arm rested on the top cushion of the couch. head laid against his hand that holds it up. gerard smiles at the pretty guy, absolutely adoring how invested he gets into even just small things. finding how nosy he is the cutest. everything about bert is perfect, nothing gerard would ever change. not even flaws. he's perfect to gerard, and they've only known each other a few weeks now. but over these past few weeks, they know more about each other than their own families do.

"maybe you do, maybe you don't. guess you'll never know. and my dad left when i was a kid. what about you? family? love interest?" gerard quickly changes the topic from him and back to bert, like he often does. bert's noticed how much gerard doesn't like talking about himself. which is different because usually when bert meets a guy, they never shut up about themselves. and definitely never listen to what bert says, unlike gerard. gerard doesn't seem to miss a thing, even pays attention to smallest details he mentions. always asks about them.

which bert really admires, but he wish gerard would open up a bit more. don't get him wrong, he knows that they've only been friends for a few weeks now. and gerard has opened up a lot more than he was in the begininng when they first started talking. it's just that bert wants to know more about him, gerard already knows a hell about him. "i have a lot of family in utah, but my army family's here. quinn, jeph, dan, my platoon. as far as love and dating or anything like that goes, i'm hopeless. i mean you listen to me talk for hours every day, all i talk about it the army and murry."

"very true." gerard teasingly laughs at bert's roast of himself, just playing around. "but you're a great man bert, honestly anyone would he lucky to even get a date with you. you're not hopeless, believe me, you're a catch. plus i find your constant talk of the army and murry cute."

"oh really?" bert grins jokingly. gerard laughs and throws the pillow that was on his lap at bert, loving his jokes and sense of humoe. always aiming to make everyone around him laugh. when their laughter fades, gerard just smiles at the blonde boy sat closely across from him as they sit facing each other on the couch. admiring his pretty blue eyes which his award winning smile compliments. the way the dark ink of his tattoos compliment his soft skin tone. "so do you give every guy the time of day like you have been me?"

"definitely not. i never even give guys my number, let alone go on dates with them. dating just isn't easy, not with my living. especially not with my family." gerard softly chuckles. leaning his side against the back cushion, fiddling with his fingers as he talks. it's already roughly 3 am, they're both exhausted but neither of them want to stop talking, gerard doesn't want to leave and go back home to mark and his mom. he doesn't want tonight to end. for the first time in a long time, he feels happy, safe. he's actually having fun.