Sacrilegious ][ WOOSAN

18

San

I struggle to complete homework as way too much confusing thoughts roam my stupid brain. I have absolutely no one to turn to, Mingi too mad to answer my texts, Wooyoung and I on bad terms, Yeji and I done forever, and Seonghwa. Fucking Seonghwa. It boggles me entirely that I let him control me for so long, just for me to fall into his arms, melt into his touch. Part of me knows I only did it since my body craves Wooyoung, but I am also not completely sure of myself. 

I change out of my uniform and nonchalantly step into the shower, taking an extra long one to clear the day's immense stress from myself. Nothing seems normal anymore, and I have to get over the fact that I went from having millions of responsibilities with my job as president, to none, and no friends within an instant. I change into some sweatpants and a plain black t-shirt, before sitting on my bed and scrolling through Instagram, videos of the incident flash through while I scroll, and it hurts me physically to watch it over and over, from different angles. Just as I am about to chuck my phone across my room in pure frustration, I hear a soft knock coming from my front door. Quickly running my hands through my hair to make myself presentable, I open the door, only to see the last person I want to see ever staring back at me.

"San, can we talk? Please?" Wooyoung fiddles with his fingers, nervously looking down at the ground while he speaks.

"Um, yeah, I guess, come in." I open the door fully for him and he walks in behind me, awkwardly standing in my large living room. "Come on, sit down." He sits on the couch and I hesitantly sit in a chair directly across from him, and breathe in his appearance. My eyes scan him up and down as they always do, but I shy away when he glances at me, and I attempt to help him along in starting a conversation as the awkwardness threatens to consume us. "So you came by to stare at me?"

"What, no, I just- Seonghwa told me that you weren't feeling the best, and I wanted to help."

"Seonghwa?"

"Y-yeah, is that a problem?" Wooyoung opens his mouth as if to say more, but closes it abruptly, waiting for my response.

"No, I just, didn't know he cared." Of course I knew he cared a little, considering he offered to help me before, but the fact that he told Wooyoung to come see me, meant he truly cared about my well being. 

"He's beside the point Sannie, I messed up, and I want to make this better for you, I really do." Remorse fills Wooyoung's expression, making me want to believe him, making me want to trust him again, but memories of the event that started everything come flashing back, and I shiver in disgust.

"I lost my friends, my status, and any potential I had. You really had to go and screw things up. You had to go and make me catch fucking feelings for you." I pause and take a deep breathe, but I can't help the sadness and frustration that devour me. "I never wanted this to happen." I start to get upset, and I rise from the chair and start pacing apprehensively.

"Please, listen. I was wrong, but San, I love you too. I was confused and thought that pleasing my friends and whatever horrible idea they had to take you down was more important than you, a real person. I never meant to actually enjoy being around you, but I do, I enjoy every second San. Please understand that it's hurting me right now just as much as it's hurting you." I let his words sink inside of me, and permeate through my mind. He loves me. Those words are almost too much for me to take, and instead of continuing our conversation, I only slowly walk up to him, and hug him softly. I rest my head in the crook of his neck, and breathe in his scent, of fresh roses and jasmine. Soft lily petals that infiltrate my mind, intoxicate all that I am. I love it. No. I love him. But I would never say it again, not like the last time I said it. It was in the wrong setting, I was feeling the wrong way.

Our embrace is pulled away too soon for my comfort, and I can tell Wooyoung is truly thinking about us, about why he came. 

"Thank you." I mutter, my eyes not able to meet his. 

"What?" He responds softly, in disbelief.

"For loving me." My body shakes as I say it, longing for him to touch me again, and he feels my desire as he places his hand on my waist. I lean into his touch slightly, feeling more secure than I have all week. 

"Sannie - I - you don't need to be president, or have a pretty girlfriend, or be accepted by our stupid school. You have me, okay? And I want to help make this last year a good one, one where we can just be ourselves, and stop caring about other people." 

"You know it's not that easy Woo-"

"We have nothing to prove San, our reputations are far gone." I shake my head trying to wrap around what he is leading towards. 

"I guess you're right, but my parents don't know I'm gay, they'll be crushed, they'll kill me-"

"San, really, truly. I. Love. You. Nothing is going to change that. Not my stupid friends, and definitely  not your parents."

"Really?" I whisper the question, letting it be the question that will clear all of my doubts. 

"Really. Now, San. Will you be my boyfriend?" He asks the final question so sweetly, with compassion and heart. His voice a song, and me the unsuspecting love-struck fool who falls for the sweet-talker. 

"You think I'm that easy?" I laugh, mustering up some confidence. 

"I know you're that easy, don't tell me this doesn't turn you on," Woo's hands rest on my waist as he leans in to me, lips inches from my own. He lifts one hand and starts to stroke downward from my lips, trailing his finger down until he reaches the string of my sweatpants, and he backs away swiftly. Fuck. "It's official then." Wooyoung smiles at me, and I can't help but smile back, finally feeling all of the puzzle pieces being put back together. As long as I have Wooyoung, maybe the rest of this stupid school year will go by much better than I originally planned.

"Of course I'll be your boyfriend, not like you actually needed me to answer anyway." I pretend to be mad, and pout cutely at him, only causing him to giggle, and hold on to me once more, before our lips meet. 

//*

Finally updated, wow. Sorry about the wait, thanks for reading and voting. Really appreciate all of the support. Wrapping this story up, it'll be a happy ending don't worry. 

Also as a side note, please suggest any bonus content that you'd like, like one shots, or side stories that you'd want based off of the parent story here. I'd be happy to write some just extra smut chapters, or some fluff too, so let me know.