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Fall or Fly

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Here's your review

Title: 2/2
I am impressed that it fits perfectly with your first chapter. It's simple yet alluring. I'm happy with this.

Cover: 2/2
I love the simplicity of the cover where a person is simply falling, surrounded by trees. It shows the depth of the story and the beautifully unspoken character of the girl who's suffering from suicidal thoughts about her life. I highly recommend this cover artist(if it's made by you then you've done a nerve wracking job).

Summary:
2/5

I suggest writing prologue as a chapter and not in the summary of the book. It's excessively long and gets boring.

But if you plan on using it as your summary write something like this-

"Choose!" I snapped my head at the mastermind behind all the miseries, his hands deciphering destruction and revenge.

Then the Eeny... till moe sentence.

"No!" My mom hollered, ripping herself out of my father's embrace.

A loud sob left my lips as I realized what was going to happen next. My mom looked at me, eyes glossy and red with tears and spoke with utmost courage, "I love you"...

It's completely up to you if you want to use it or not. I'm just trying to tell you here that summary is never too long. It's short and precise, giving relevant details.

You should add some suspense to your summary so that when readers read it, they just want to open your book and find it worth it.
You know it's a simple trick but works wonders.

Grammar: 1/3

I really liked the idea when you used a question as your introduction.

The moment I started reading the next paragraph I found that there were a handful of mistakes.
Maybe write it like this=

My reflection glared at me through the glass, noticing the aberrant features I'd acquired over time, eyes which were once emerald now a dusty green, staring at me as if I was the lowest scum on earth. My thin ruby hair hung to my head in clumps, oh how I admired the thick ones earlier. The lips which were pink and soft were now dry and an unhealthy grey. Not only that; my skin completed my flawless appearance by being dull, pasty and extremely pale. (Note the sarcasm she uses here)

If you read this paragraph you would understand that your sentences were short and broken down unnecessarily. Try to use conjunctions to add more insight into the sentence.
I think you should refer to YouTube to learn more about this.

The second thing that stood out to me were the ellipses. Usually they are written just as three periods(...), not more or less.

Next thing was when you want to write a dialogue please use a comma before abruptly ending it.

Example:
"No, it's fine," I called back in the most cheerful voice I could muster.

Next you kept switching between tenses. From past to present and then again to past.

I want you to correct those mistakes.

Characters-
1/5

I couldn't understand the personality of Charlotte, Paige or Katrina. Try adding more descriptions. I could not tell if they were 'strong', 'sweet', 'mean' etc. You know what I'm talking about right?

Imagery:
2/5

I could not visualize anything. Your story and dialogues were scattered and it came out to be off. I'm sorry if you feel bad about this.

Vocabulary:
3/5
Please try to read published books of your genre. Trust me it really helps to improve your writing skills and vocabulary.

Hook-
0/5
Unfortunately I wasn't hooked at all. The first chapter is the building chapter and trust me I couldn't find anything interesting to read in it. I think the second chapter was much better than your first one.

Your story seems rushed. Try explaining everything; the surroundings, the way character feels, small changes in behaviour.

They are all small things but really helps in writing a good book. I'm not perfect but I'm only trying to help.

Highly recommend a good EDITOR for your book!

Total: 13/32
Don't mind my mathematics lol.

For

xxInAHeartbeatxx