R i d e | a dialogue story

[18] What about everything we had (2)

She didnt know how long she stayed there in the rain. She sat on a bench, feeling the cold rain seep through her clothes and hair. It felt like days. She tried to imagine her life without Clarise. Everytime she tried, a tear would stream down again.

A life without Clarise... What was that like? Clarise had been with her for almost 4 years now. Their anniversary was in two months. No, there would be no anniversary.

It felt like a terrible dream. Or a horrible prank Clarise was playing on her. Clarise couldn't have fallen out of love. She was her soulmate. Her other half. There was no way she would fall out of love. Marissa sat on the bench for hours. Shivering from the cold and the fear of having to live without the one person she treasured the most. 3 years Clarise had been with her. 2 years as best friends before that. She had known Clarise for most of her life.

How could she live without her?

Marissa walked to a nearby ledge. The ocean was down there, heavy waves crashing into sharp rocks down below. How... could she live without her?

Marissa looked at the rocks. The violent waves seemingly calling out to her. She stood up on the ledge, her heart palpitating.

Memories flooded through her mind. Clarise was there when her parents kicked her out of the house for being bisexual. Clarise was there for Marissa's first starbucks. Clarise was Marissa's first everything. Clarise was supposed to be Marissa's last everything. She was there when Marissa cut herself. She was there when Marissa got her first job. Marissa's first love, first close friend, first girlfriend.

And she fell out of love. Straight into Marcus' arms.

Marissa screamed, sitting on the ledge instead. It was her fault Clarise left. She was pathetic in every way possible. She wasn't good enough for Clarise. Brave enough to show Clarise that she was the one for her. Now she didn't even have the guts to kill herself. Pathetic.

"You know, jumping into the ocean isn't the best way to kill yourself." A voice sounded behind her. Marissa turned, a snarl set in place.

"I'm just saying! A gunshot through the head would be a much quicker, painless way to die. You know?" A girl, not much younger then she, with jet black hair worn in two messy space buns.

"Kati. Kati Lopéz." She stretched out her hand to shake Marissa's. She was wearing a white crop-top and neon green shorts. Not a lot of people could pull of neon green. Kati managed.

Marissa turned, mumbling a soft "hey". Kati pulled herself up onto the ledge. "Who broke your heart? Boyfriend?"

"Girlfriend. And it's none of your business." Marissa growled. Giggling, Kati brought out a game boy.

"Okay, buddy. Hey, look, I have Mario Kart. I bet you 5 bucks it'll make you feel better. Wanna play?" Kati looked up at Marissa, a smile on her face.

Marissa was hesitant, but nodded. "I love Mario Kart."

"Who doesn't?!" Kati passed her the game boy.

"Why are you doing this... Kat-Kati?"

She shrugged. "I don't know. You looked like you needed a friend. I needed a friend too, to be honest."

Marissa nodded, not prying further. "Marissa. By the way. Thanks for letting me play."

Kati smiled. "Anytime, Mar." She pulled out a jerky stick from her bag, staring out into the ocean as Marissa played on her game boy. Mari looked at her in gratitude, a smile starting to form on her lips.

"Whoops! Dropped a shirt button." Kati started laughing as she saw her button drop into the ocean. Marissa laughed along with her.

"I'm gonna call you button from now on."

"Dear God, no!"

♦️

You are not alone. Even if you think you are. You are never alone. People may come and go, but know that you are still loved and blessed. It hurts, but it will get better. I promise. Suicide is never the answer. Look up. Look ahead. Because you have a bright future. Your heart might ache for a little while, but with that, you learn how to heal yourself. You learn how to grow stronger and love harder. Don't cut yourself off from the people who love you. You are never alone.

(a/n: dms always open if y'all wanna talk. love you, famfam ♥️.)